Mary the 1st I am, I am

Counting down the days

2012-01-17T21:46:00.005-06:00

While attempting to function after the third stomach bug in three months, I found myself trying to count the days until my Sexy Beast will be home...two more months. Two more months. Two more months.

I know that doesn't sound like a lot to most people, and in all honesty it isn't. I'm thankful that my husband is at a school and not being shot at in a combat zone. I'm thankful he has a good job that has afforded him the opportunity to go from a GED to a Masters degree in eleven years. I'm thankful he is alive, even when we can't seem to agree on things.

To say this past year has been trying, is a vast understatement.

The boys and I moved to be closer to family, which just happened to be our next duty station, while the hubby went to school. He then broke his arm on his last day at work, landing him in the OR and then months of healing before he could once again pass his push ups, THEN wait for another class date to open up. I started a great job but found a very substandard nanny, then found a great one who ended up quitting the day before she was supposed to start, then had a fill in that didn't work out, THEN found another great one that has been fantastic. I said goodbye to my father, but was able to improve my relationship with his wonderful wife & family.

I recently found a blog, through a link on facebook, that really makes me smile. So, here is one of my Kairos moments I'm holding onto with a death grip

While Eric was home we were able to have a short date night. For the first time I ordered ribs, with the intention of sharing with the boys when I got home.

Cooper quickly stripped the meat off & proceeded to suck every morsel off.

Carter, on the other hand, didn't fancy getting his hands dirty & cried until I cut the meat off and handed him his fork.

So, although I was up most of last night with another stomach bug, I'm grateful that I had the nanny come for half the day so I could rest...because as luck would have it, looks like Cooper got it too. Also a HUGE thanks to my fellow Army Wife, Lora, who came to my house after I ruined our shopping trip in Raleigh, by getting sick, followed me back to my house and got the boys dinner & put them down...all so I could puke in peace. I honestly wouldn't have survived this last year without such thoughtful family and friends.

So Grateful

2011-12-24T12:32:00.002-06:00

Roundtrip ticket home $700

Having my Sexy Beast home for Christmas: PRICELESS

Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanza and every other holiday this time of year! Take the time to tell your loved ones how much they mean to you, and keep the true meaning of Christmas alive!

My laptop died, and with the holiday shopping, everyone is sold out, so bare with me until I get a new one!

Give 'em the pickle!!

2011-11-30T12:36:00.005-06:00

When I was starting orientation for my current employer, back in May, we had to watch a video entitled, "Give 'em the pickle." The title catches your attention, but so does the content. The short explanation was a customer always asked for an extra pickle and had always received one without any charge, but one day a new employee refused & wanted to charge the customer for the extra pickle. The customer was infuriated and wrote a letter to the owner, Bob Farrell, who wrote back & started the catch phrase "Give 'em the pickle."

The principle is simple, if going the extra mile causes a small loss in profit BUT satisfies the customer, DO IT! Keeping customers happy is what keeps them coming back.

Today, more than any other day, I wish this video was part of the AAFES employment orientation. Commissary shopping with the boys is one of my very LEAST favorite things to do. That being said, I've found that if I go to Charlies (in the PX food court) and get them fries (which come in a paper cup), they stay almost completely preoccupied during my grocery shopping and it is a better experience for everyone. I always order a regular fry, costing $1.99, and ask for an extra cup so I can split it between both boys & the can hold them on their own. I've done this at numerous fast food places, and have never had a problem. Well today, there was an employee in line behind me and as I asked for an extra cup, she says to the employee behind the counter, "she can have a paper tray." I turned around and looked at her and said, "I just want a cup so my kids can hold the fries without spilling them," to which she replied (with a head whip) talking too fast to comprehend fully, but that those cups cost more money than the trays, so if I wanted another cup, I would have to order more fries. The confused girl behind the counter gave me a tray and I walked to the other end of the counter to some other employees and said, "All I want is a stupid cup, how much do I have to pay for an empty cup?" They were also confused and a girl went over and grabbed a plastic water cup and gave it to me. I said thanks & turned to the employee in line and said, "was that really so hard?"

I normally have an exuberant amount of patience for poor customer service, but COME ON! To those few military wives that read my blog, I'm sure you can attest to the continued poor customer service at EVERY commissary, PX, BX, or NEX. I rarely find an employee that doesn't act like I'm disturbing them if I ask a question. My favorite is when I have to stand there waiting, while they finish up their personal conversation with another employee or on the phone. The only exception to this is the baggers at the commissary. They almost always are polite and go the extra mile because they know their positive attitude reflects directly on the tip they receive from the customer (since they work ONLY for tips).

I really try to keep this concept in mind at work, especially when dealing with people on the worst day of their life. I always bring an extra popsicle/juice/crackers for the patients siblings or parents. It's the little things that can make a bad situation more tolerable.

So, was I overreacting or making a point? I'm still debating that one.

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Medicare reimbursement is becoming contingent on patient customer satisfaction surveys, and many hospitals (especially Emergency Departments) are getting poor ratings.

So here's some facts to consider before you head to the ED. The National average waiting time (just in the waiting room) is 4 hrs. You aren't seen in the order in which you arrive, you're seen by the severity of your issue. If your child has a fever, give them medicine BEFORE you get to the hospital (and know what medicine you gave) since you may be waiting awhile to see a Dr. And, seeing as it is an EMERGENCY department, be kind to your nurse...you never know WHY they haven't been in your room in almost an hour. When you have a patient that isn't breathing, it kind of trumps an ear ache.

Spending time with my boys

2011-11-01T13:12:00.005-05:00

We were lucky enough that Eric was able to take a short trip home before heading off to his next school! We planned a short vacation to Williamsburg and had a pretty good time, aside from the melt downs.

Since active duty get one free visit to Busch Gardens, we knew that was definitely on our list. Eric and I didn't ride any adult rides, but we had fun watching the boys run around and even ride the kiddie version of Blast Off & Re-entry. Eric saw the face painting and said he wanted to pick something out for Carter. I agreed as long as I got to pick out Coopers.

Here is Carter

Here is Cooper

Here is Eric's punishment for his choice

As we walked through the park the boys both finally fell asleep in the stroller, which brought on the funniest and most disturbing comments...mostly "awwww, look at the dead baby!" Most people laughed & pointed (especially since we also had the backpack leashes), and a few gave dirty looks. I thought it was great, and since Busch Gardens was celebrating the 13th year of Hallo-Scream, it was very fitting!

The boys didn't do as well with the Ripley's Museum or Colonial Williamsburg, so we found Inflation Nation (which was just bought out by Bounce House) and the boys spent two hours running & sliding.

Except for where we stayed, Wyndham Govenor's Green, it was a great time. Eric and I have had timeshare through Wyndham for the past 6 years and we have never been treated so poorly, which all centered around having children under the age of 2. So, if you're looking for timeshare, don't go with Wyndham. We're actually looking into selling all together!

I've been writing this post in my mind for the past 2 weeks

2011-09-25T23:30:00.003-05:00

As many of you know, my father was diagnosed with Brain Cancer last October. He had surgery to remove it soon after and was being treated with chemo & radiation. This event prompted my involvement in Relay for Life & to go see him back in January.

Many events have occurred since then, but none as emotional as the last two weeks.

Saturday, Sept 10th:
My Dad's wife, Ginny, sent me a text to call her when I could. I had the pleasure of bonding with Ginny when they came to visit me in Hawaii, and when visiting my Oma in Montana. She called to let me know that my Dad's mobility had continued to deteriorate & that he was going to be placed in a Nursing Home to get Physical Therapy in hopes of gaining enough strength to come home soon.

I cried when I got off the phone because he had slowly lost more and more strength with the long term steroid use, as treatment, and it was another reminder that his body was failing him.

Monday, Sept 12th:
I received a phone call from my Mother informing me that my father had been admitted to the hospital, and the cancer had spread. I was stunned & immediately called Ginny. My father has always been a man of few words, and NEVER complained, so when he started to voice his pain, Ginny immediately got him to the ER. There they discovered he had a raging UTI & kidney infection & admitted him for treatment. After getting his full history, they decided to do a CT...which is when they discovered that tumors were present in every organ. My heart sank. I called his RN, and made sure that I had enough time to get there.

Tuesday, Sept 13th:
Dad said he wanted to go home & be with his dogs, so Ginny made arrangements for Hospice & the VA, and got him home. I called work, hysterical, and told them that I was leaving immediately, but would be back in 8 days. My SIL had just arrived Saturday, with her adorable son (who is 3 weeks younger than the boys) and selflessly offered to watch the boys so I could focus on what I needed to.

Wednesday, Sept 14th:
After 3 planes & 8 hours, I made it to Tucson. My GPS decided it didn't recognize Arizona, so I somehow found my way to my hotel, picked up a new GPS, then headed to my Dad's house. Up until Monday, I hadn't been aware of my Dad's blindness, and was unprepared for the state I found him. He laid in the hospital bed (which the VA was kind enough to supply), and was only able to answer with a simple "yes" or "no." Ginny put me right to work helping feed him, and at that time I was thankful he couldn't see the tears streaming down my face. I could see that he didn't have much time left, but I was eternally grateful to be at his side.

Thursday & Friday, Sept 15 & 16th:
Hospice provided us with a portable suction, since his ability to swallow was limited & he continued to choke on anything we gave him. We gave the meds as prescribed, made sure he was clean, and positioned him as best we could. During this time I was able to help Ginny make arrangements for his wishes.

My younger sister emailed me a letter that she wanted me to read to him. I read it many times in hopes that I wouldn't break down, but I couldn't help cry as I read the touching words of an appreciate daughter.

As I said, my Father was a simple man, and he wanted to donate his body to science. This service is offered by Science Care, and they contract a mortuary, and after about 3-4 weeks, the cremation remains are mailed back to the family.

By Friday night his breathing had become more labored & fast...and I tried to prepare myself. Ginny didn't leave his side for more than a few minutes to help with the kids or help me organize papers. She talked to him & played his favorite Oldies in the background.

Saturday, Sept 17th:
He breathing stayed fast & labored throughout the day, and by the evening he was no longer responding. I continued to give him Morphine which slowly seemed to ease his breathing. I continued to sit at the kitchen table reading one of the many books I brought, while Ginny stayed at his side.

Every night on the drive back to the hotel, I cried. I cried for the pain he was in, the loss I already was feeling, and the pain in Ginny's eyes.

Sunday, Sept 18th:
We continued with out routine, although he could no longer take anything by mouth, and I could hear his lungs begin to fill with fluid. I continued with the morphine and keeping his as comfortable as possible. I helped with the kids & anything else to allow Ginny to be at his side.

Monday, Sept 19th:
His arms and legs started to get cold, and his breathing more and more shallow. I finally realized that no matter how well I positioned him with pillows, in the end it didn't matter.

That night before I left for the hotel, I grabbed his hand, told him I loved him & kissed him on his forehead. He had been resting quietly all day, but I could feel him slipping away. I cried horribly on the way back to the hotel & when I got into my room. I stepped into the shower & prayed that he would pass before I had to leave on Wednesday, so I could be there to support Ginny.

As soon as I stepped out of the shower, Ginny called to tell me he had passed. I went into fix-it mode & threw on my PJ's & headed back to their house. I sat on the porch with Ginny until the Hospice RN arrived to pronounce him, & until the mortuary came to pick him up.

She told me stories & conversations she had with him, and we both held each other and cried.

Tuesday, Sept 20th:
We tied up loose ends & Ginny & I made a trip out to the Air Force Base to get some things fixed & go to the commissary. This allowed us a lot of time to talk & reminisce...it was just what we needed.

That afternoon I realized what I needed. I gave the kids hugs, thanked Danny for all his help, and said my goodbyes to Ginny. I headed back to my hotel room and just simply cried. I had been ignoring text messages and phone calls all week because I honestly couldn't allow myself to talk or I would have never been strong enough to help Ginny. I talked with Eric for almost 2 hours and then cried some more. Just before bed I walked to Denny's & ate dinner in a restaurant, by myself for the first time ever.

Wednesday, Sept 21st:
I left for the airport at 3:30am and was headed back home. Finally at 8:00pm, I arrived back in North Carolina, and was greeted by a smile & hug from E.J. (old Army friend from HI) who was compassionate enough to give me a ride home.

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I'm still sad. I'm still hurting. But, I am eternally grateful for the time I was able to spend with my Father, doing those Nursing skills that have become second nature for me. I'm grateful that I could be there as a physical and emotional support to Ginny and the family. At first she apologized for being a bad hostess, but I quickly corrected her and let her know that if my husband was in the same state, I would also be at his side, every moment I could.

Please forgive my absence for the awhile, I'm emotionally drained and physically exhausted.

I want to thank all my family and friends for their kind words, and actions. My SIL, Nicole, was so accurate in saying that God has a plan...and there was a reason for her to arrive when she did. And, Amy S. for not hesitating to volun-tell her husband, who was more than willing, to give me a ride home. And especially husband & brother, Mike, who were really the only people I knew I could call at any hour to discuss what was going on and pour out my emotions.

Too cute!

2011-08-24T21:05:00.007-05:00

As you all know, I don't get freebies from companies, or give in to the many emails asking me to review products in exchange for free stuff. That's just not how I roll. But, I do love to share things that I LOVE. So, here's another!

Leann, from Lulu's Little Shop, makes these adorable owl hats. I'd seen them on a military wife auction & wanted them so bad, but I'm on a budget & had to wait til the time was right. As you can see, the boys adore them...

...or at least Carter does :o) (he's the one that ALWAYS has some kind of hat on)

Her prices are VERY reasonable, and she can do whatever color and/or combos you want. She is super friendly & they arrived within a week!

So, go show her some love! HERE is her FB page, and HERE is her Etsy page.

Pay It Forward

2011-08-15T15:37:00.004-05:00

This morning I received a text from my sister asking if I still had my breast pump because she had a girl at work that was in desperate need of baby items. Since my mother bought me the pump I thought it was only fair to call and ask her permission. What she said has sparked an idea..."of course, pay it forward!"

I have been so blessed with friends and family that recognized the needs I had, in preparing for the twins, and stepped in to help me get the items I so desperately needed. AND, who have continued to send me clothes and other items when times were especially tough.

So, I NEED YOUR HELP!!!

I've been going through all the baby stuff & I have BINS of clothes (since it was for 2) that I want to give to someone YOU know that could really benefit from it. But remember, I only have BOY items from ages 0-18mo and shoes up to size 6.

So, email me at: way2cool2bcocky (at) gmail (dot) com
Tell me about the person you have in mind & why.

Also, email me if you have something you would like to donate such as: gift card, items you make (I will be sure to link to your etsy/business page), or items you are trying to get rid of that are still in excellent condition.

I only have a small network of people, but I know you guys probably have someone in mind.

Once I get all the nominations, I'll post a voting poll on the Right column for everyone to vote on.
As of now I don't know how many winners they'll be (it depends on if anyone else donates & the ages of the babies), but I plan on a few. I'm going to go with the flat rate boxes, since it'll be cheapest for me, so I'm guessing at least 5 people.

I'll post the nominees on August 30th, and leave one week for voting.

Also, as people donate other items (come on, you know you want to) I'll update this post if anyone wants to donate girl things.

Help me get the word out to find some nominees & donors!!

So...I think my neighbors are making Meth

2011-08-10T21:03:00.004-05:00

(**this is NOT the actual neighbor. Retreived from Google Image**)

If they aren't making meth, they are doing something illegal! There house is the same layout as mine, yet there are always at least 4 different vehicles (all VERY nice) parked there. They have black plastic blocking out all their windows & at least 10 LARGE dogs.

I first got suspicious when we originally looked at this house. Seeing that they parked cars in their driveway & their yard I could tell they were classy. Also in their front yard they had a BBQ grill, riding lawn mower, a bijillion kids toys (to include power wheels) and trash all over their patio. (Yet I get hate mail about weeds in my flower beds??)

Another one of my favorite antics are how they use their backyard to drive laps in their 4-wheelers. Sorry, is this something that everyone does?

In the past I've found her dogs running the neighborhood, in the 100+ degree heat, which I knock & ring the doorbell for over 5 minutes (which there are at least 3 cars there).

Today, Koa started going crazy in the kitchen. I walk over to see what he's barking at find one of their dogs on the other side of my sliding glass door. I'd encountered this dog before, on one of his many outings in the neighborhood, so I knew he was friendly, but it was the principle! I walked next door and knocked & rang the door bell every 30 seconds until someone finally came to the front door. I informed her that her dog was in my backyard to which she says, "wow, I'm so sorry." But that was it. I said, "can you come get him?" She says "oh yeah." I start walking back to my house (while avoiding the landminds her dogs leave in BOTH our front yards) and wait, and wait, and wait, until finally she sends her daughter over to get the dog.

Also, it's never the same cars parked there. Or the same men that sit on the front porch & smoke (and make out with one of the regulars). Also, the other day I went outside to put the trash out at 0530 and see people getting into cars and also people just arriving and leaving their cars.

I'm I super paranoid because I'm not a fan of theirs, or should I really be worried that my bedroom is the closet room to their house...in case of explosion?

Pulling my head out of the sand

2011-08-06T13:44:00.003-05:00

Living in an Army community is unlike any other experience you could imagine. For the first 5 years of our marriage we were immersed in all things Army. But, the last 5 years we spent 30 miles outside of an Air Force base. Eric drove 20 miles of dirt road to work each day, and unless you lived on Camp Rudder, the Army was just something in the back of your mind. Eric was non-deployable at that location because it was TRADOC (Military Training), so I didn't focus or worry about his safety as much...except for jumping out of airplanes & helicopters.

Over the past 2 years, I've once again had to face the reality of being an Army wife.

It was all too real when I was contacted by an old friend to let me know one of our fellow Gimlet wives lost her husband just 3 weeks after their third child was born.

And then again when a new Army wife called, with a quiver in her voice, asking if there was any OTHER reason why two uniformed soldiers were approaching her neighbors house.

And when I had a patient's mother ask about my bracelet, which honors John D. Amos II, and then shows me hers in honor of her brother who was killed last year.

And now, as I read about the 31 soldiers that were killed in Afghanistan, my heart breaks once again. It breaks every time I read about a soldier paying the ultimate sacrifice, and I cry for the family they leave behind.

Although I'll never personally know most of these brave men & women, I love them for their courage and selfless sacrifice.

The Military, as a whole, is a family. And we truly do mourn the loss of every Soldier, Airman, Marine & Sailor. You are never forgotten!

Tip of the Hat & Wag of the Finger

2011-08-05T20:17:00.005-05:00

Okay, I totally stole this concept from the Great Stephen T. Colbert, but it's for a great cause! Since starting my new job I've come in contact with more people than I could have ever imagined. And in doing that, there are a few things I'd like to point out.

A Tip of the Hat to...

parents that know what medications (and dosages) their children are taking...and what times they take them.

parents that understand that we have their child's best interest at heart. I've yet to meet a nurse that won't question an order if they truly feel there's a better way for the child.

parents that care about their kids & show compassion when needed.

parents that truly attempted to make a doctor's appointment or get a referral to urgent care before coming straight to the ER.

parents that allow the staff to bribe their children with popsicles.

parents that know their limits & will either step out or stay talk with their child or help distract them during a procedure.

A Wag of the Finger to...

parents that bring their child to the ER for a fever, but don't own a thermometer or fail to try to medicate their child for said "fever."

parents who's children have SEVERE life-threatening allergies to medicine or food, yet don't have an allergy alert bracelet on their child. This is a pet peeve of mine!! Do you really want to run the risk of someone accidently giving your child a medicine or food that could kill them! There are a million different options for bracelets, anklets or even necklaces so ANYONE can clearly see your child has an allergy.

people who state their allergy to morphine is "it makes me tired." Really...really??

people who come to the ER to get a prescription for tylenol or motrin (b/c medicare/medicaid pays for it), yet they are carrying a Coach diaper bag.

parents who bring their kid to the ER for an ear ache, but complain about the wait time. If anyone is unaware, the patients in the ER are not seen in order of arrival, they are seen in order of who is the most sick/unstable/needs the most procedures.

All that being said, I really do love my job!! I'm learning so much & getting exposed to so many different people, which is always great.

What do you love & what would you change about your job?

Some people have too much time on their hands

2011-07-30T20:18:00.006-05:00

Dear Nosey Neighbor,

I realize that you must have too much time on your hands if you felt the need to notify my property manager (which I'm assuming you did b/c you know the owner...or you are just THAT nosey) that "although [my] lawn is being mowed, the flower beds are in need of weeding."

Seriously...SERIOUSLY!!

Did you ever think that I might only have 1-2 hrs on my days off that I can manage to mow my lawn (while the boys are napping)!!

I'm not saying that I didn't need to pull some weeds, but thanks for ignoring the VACANT house next door that I was mowing their front yard because, you know, it's the NEIGHBORLY thing to do.

Whatever. Be a wimp.

Oh, and in case you weren't aware, YOU SUCK!

The Geographical Single Mom,

Mary

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So, for the followers I have left, I've been a little busy. Eric was able to come home for 30 days, and I chose to spend that time with him...and unpacking...and pulling weeds.

We were able to spend our birthdays & 10 year anniversary together. It amazes me how far we've come over the last decade!!

Oh, and I got a new car....a car I've always wanted...in my favorite color!!!

Meet the Mini Cooper S Countryman!!She is a thing of beauty, and drives like a go kart!
I want to give a HUGE shout out to Alan @ Flow Mini in Raleigh for his extreme patience as I test drove 4 different Mini's and working out the trade in for my Honda. All the staff were amazing & everyone had such a positive attitude!!! I'm loving my new car, and Eric can comfortably fit too!!

Work has been great. I'm learning a TON, but I'm also spending most of my time studying for numerous certifications. I'm off orientation the second week in August & I'm excited, but also scared. I'll talk more about that later.

For the few readers I still have left, thanks for sticking around. More help is headed my way in September and should be around until Eric is finally able to be with us again next spring. I am stalking without commenting, but I do try to drop a line every once in awhile.

I hope everyone is having a great summer, and I have a great post brewing about some tips on how NOT to be a moronic parent! Stay tuned!!!

It gets easier...right??

2011-06-06T11:40:00.004-05:00

Wouldn't you be grumpy if you had to be woken up while sleeping like this??

I love my religion, but going to church has become a battleground.

The boys are NOT fans of sitting for 3 hrs, so I've backed it off to just the 1st hour, but it seems like that is too much! They wrestle with me & each other, throw their toys, bother EVERYONE around us and nothing seems to keep their interest.

And until they become afternoon nappers, which would screw with my sleeping schedule during the week, they end up with a short, or non-existent nap time. Makes for very unhappy kiddos.

It's slightly easier for me (not necessarily them) when I can sit with my brother & his family, but that isn't always an option. And our chapel is tiny with very few pews, and I've learned that sitting in the chairs just isn't an option.

Their going to grow out of this, right??

What toys/distractions have worked for your kids at this age (15 months), to keep them entertained???

In better news, Cooper is now sleeping until about 6am!!! I'll take it. I think that spending at least 30 minutes outside in the heat, and keeping them busy during the day has helped. AND, they may have just needed this time to get into their own routine. Although Eric just left again, we look forward to him making an appearance in time for my birthday at the end of the month, his in July, and our 10 yr anniversary a few days after that!.

Giveaway winner & SO much more

2011-06-04T12:11:00.004-05:00

After only 11 entries, it was a pretty even playing field. And the winner is...

JEANNIE!!!!!!

Congrats to my #1 PIMP! I hope you enjoy the book as much as I did!!

Send me your mailing address to way2cool2bcocky(at)gmail(dot)com and I'll get it sent out this week...hopefully ;o)

And, here is the latest torture we've made the boys survive.

(I think Carter looks like Jack Jack from the Incredibles!!)

I think it turned out cute, and it always makes people laugh. Yes, there have been a few that give me a scowl or stink eye, but they can suck it!!! It's hair, it grows back! And, if anyone can pull it off, a 1 yr old can :o)

What have you done to your kids/furbabies that shock people??

Come join the fun!

2011-05-28T10:47:00.005-05:00

The AMAZING Jessica G. is hosting a True Colors Swap on her blog & I'm so excited to finally participate!

I've been super busy lately, and subsequently, super unhappy. I realized I wasn't taking the time to do the things that I love! I haven't been blogging or reading as much, so that is why I was so excited that Jessica put together this swap! I wanted to participate last year, but LIFE happened...so come join us & maybe you'll get a kick-A package from me...so you KNOW it will be good :o)

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Don't forget to enter my Giveaway!!! It ends midnight, May 30th!!

"Bitter Is The New Black" GIVEAWAY!!!

2011-05-24T11:38:00.004-05:00

Let me start by saying I have two seriously Kick-A little sisters! With ~~months of whining, threatning to disown, and begging~~ subtle hints, these two fabulous ladies waiting in line for 2 hrs to not only get me a signed copy of Jen Lancaster's first novel, "If You Were Here," but they also got a signed copy of her first memoir "Bitter Is The New Black" so I could give it away to one of my fabulous readers!

Here is my original review.

So, the rules...hmmmmm...

You don't have to be a public follower, because I track you with sitemeter anyway!

Leave one comment per entry

1 entry

Comment on one of my last 5 posts (if you already have, you ROCK, and leave a comment stating "I'm a Pimp!")
Start following Jen Lancaster's blog (honor system!)

2 Entries

Blog about this giveaway (leave url)
Post a link to this giveaway on Facebook

This giveaway will close Monday, May 30th @1159 EST

Good Luck!!!

A guest post by Taylor Darden

2011-05-22T10:47:00.004-05:00

I received an email from Taylor last month asking if she could write a guest post on my blog. I was skeptical at first, and was honestly expecting some kind of spam (which is what I usually get), but she demonstrated a true compassion for spreading awareness about issues facing our American Soldiers!

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Supporting Our Soldiers After Service
by Taylor Darden

Many military families remember the days when their spouses return home as being some of the best memories. Most of these families will continue on being happy afterwards, but for some families, helping their spouses adjust with illness and sickness can be an extremely tough situation. The difficulty involves the fact that a number of these health problems happen to be more mental than physical issues.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is one of the most common types of health problems for soldiers in post-duty times. It’s also an extremely hard problem to diagnose. Even with high awareness of the disorder’s prevalence in soldiers, it can be difficult to diagnose because many soldiers are often embarrassed or ashamed to admit that they may have PTSD. It’s important for families to take notice of any odd behavior like depression, apathy, and mood swings that may be common with PTSD. For the many soldiers who suffer from PTSD, a solid support system and cognitive therapy are two of the biggest helpers in their coping process.

Along with PTSD, Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) is often regarded as being highly tied to military service. This is usually a result of a physical harm or trauma on the frontline, which ends up causing some long term issues. One of the reasons TBI has been called the signature wound of the War on Terror is because the violent vibrations caused by roadside bombs can hit soldiers with such force that the shockwave alone can cause a TBI by rattling their head about in their helmet. Any type of blurred vision, dizziness or balance issues, as well as trouble with memory and erratic mood swings after service can be recognizable symptoms and key in diagnosing a case of TBI. As with most health issues, the earlier those symptoms are recognized, the better the chances are of preventing any type of further damage to the brain.

Another major issue for older and younger veterans is mesothelioma. This is a health risk associated with exposure to asbestos, a commonly used material throughout the past 100 years (oftentimes on bases and shipyards). Although it’s not being used anymore, the health problems related to asbestos don’t develop right away, making an early diagnose crucial in helping these patients. Mesothelioma life expectancy is usually only a year on average, making early awareness and realization even more important than with most health problems. Often times these patients may require the help of care givers (often family members or spouses). Currently, mesothelioma is treated with combination of chemotherapy and radiation therapy, although to little avail. If it is caught early enough however, mesothelioma tumors can be surgically removed leading to a much higher rate of survival, making it important for veterans to take note of extremely subtle symptoms like a difficulty breathing and heaviness in the chest.

It’s very unfortunate that that some of these military families are forced to undergo even more stress and difficulty in their lives. In the end, increased knowledge, awareness, and overall support from family and friends will only help to provide our soldiers the best situation possible.

**************************************************

Don't unfollow me yet!!

2011-05-17T18:58:00.007-05:00

So, I'm in North Carolina, but life sure has thrown a few curve balls my way these past few weeks!

Cooper has decided that he doesn't need to sleep...pretty much ever. He is waking up every 2 hrs at night and is only taking about a 45 min nap. This wouldn't be so bad if Eric had arrived when we originally planned.

He was supposed to join me after two weeks, but on his last day (and his last jump) he had a less than desirable landing and ended up breaking his wrist, which had to be repaired via surgery.

He made it up a week late, and now can no longer attend his scheduled class in Arizona, and has to go back to Florida for an undetermined amount of time...waiting for his wrist to heal & then another class date & even possibly another duty station.

I started orientation and am LOVING the new hospital!!! They are 3 times larger than the one I used to work at, and I'm super excited to work in the Pediatric ED.

So, with all the stress & frustration, I've found one thing to be grateful for...I can wear ANY color shoes I want! And this is what I chose:
Don't you love them!! I have great plans to graffiti them out with signatures & my own wicked style.

I also have some great news! I have some AMAZING sisters that hooked me up, and coincidentally, will have hooked up one lucky reader. Yes, you read that right, I'm going to do a giveaway! A real one :o)

So, stay posted, don't unfollow me, and to give you an idea of how busy I've been...my nanny worked almost 50 hrs last week! Hopefully things will slow down once I hit the floor & get on a normal schedule.

Do you live next door to Bree?

2011-05-01T22:36:00.004-05:00

Where does the REAL Bree Van DeKamp live?? Because she obviously isn't in North Carolina...that or she was too busy to notice I moved in down the street! Where's my basket of homemade muffins & scones? Where's my invitation to afternoon poker? Who's house do I go to for the latest gossip? Desperate Housewives has totally ruined my expectations for neighbors. My new FAVORITE next door neighbor has a front yard full of toys, lets their dog poop in my side yard, drives their 4 wheelers in their backyard, has 4 enormous dogs (that bark at all hours), and has 2 campers in their backyard. Where is Bree when you need her??

We had the opportunity to live at our last duty station for 5 1/2 years, so I'm a little out of practice when it comes to moving. We've also been very fortunate to find tenants for our homes in FL!!

We were able to find a place to rent when we visited a few weeks ago, and the move has actually gone pretty smoothly. Minus the tornado warnings! I've already picked out the closet that the boys, Koa and I will hid in (if necessary) and have began to plan my 72hr kit (which is packed and on it's way here).

Our drive up was uneventful, which is always a good thing, and we were able to transport most of the boys things. I'm making it work until the rest of our household goods arrive, and Eric is staying with some friends while he finishes up in FL.

The great thing about living close to family is that I had an extra pair of hands at church today...even if we only made it through the first block hour. Planning nap times & lunch around 1pm church is going to take some getting used to.

I've found a nanny, and she's coming over for a few hours everyday this week so the boys can get used to her before I start the 12 hr shifts. I literally jumped for joy & squealed when I received the official offer to work in the Pediatric ED. This is such an amazing learning opportunity for me, and it's guaranteed hours.

So far I've only had 2 major tear-filled meltdowns since Eric left on Tuesday...but the boys are starting to get back on a schedule. At least Carter is. Cooper still doesn't want to sleep through the night, and if I let him cry for more than 20 seconds he'll get himself so worked up (not to mention, wake Carter up) that he pukes.

I know I've been scarce, but I'm still around. I honestly don't know how I could have survived this past week without my brother & my Kick-A SIL! He even came over and mowed my front lawn (the back is so big we need a riding mower), and they watched the boys Monday so Eric and I could get all the last minute stuff we needed before he had to leave in the morning.

This summer is gonna suck without Eric, but at least I have family close by! This is a true luxury in the Army, so Michelle, get ready to be sick of me!

REALLY??

2011-04-19T09:15:00.004-05:00

One thing I have NEVER been is graceful. I frequently trip over my own two feet, and am personally surprised I made it through the pregnancy without serious injury!

To add to my clumsiness, I usually see it coming. I'll go to pour something, and a split second before I make a huge mess, I literally see how I'm going to spill...but there's no stopping me by that point.

So, in an attempt to prevent more accidents, I always try to keep my main walking area in the house clear of clutter.

In preparing for the move we are a little more cluttered than normal and our vacuum, which happens to be a metal Kirby, was in my way. Now, when I say in my way, I mean within 3 ft radius of me, because I'm just that clumsy.

I catch my feet on things all the time, but this time was different. The pain didn't go away, and it bruised right away and got very swollen. I buddy-taped it with two other toes and took some Motrin.

Two days later it's still sporting a nice bruise:

But, it isn't nearly as painful!

What irritated me the most is about two seconds after I grabbed my foot in pain and ~~screamed obscenities~~ grimaced in pain, my husband said, "be careful!" I gave him the look of death and said, "REALLY?"

I've never understood the point of saying "be careful" "watch your step" or "did that hurt", other than to point out to the clumsy person that they are a moron & klutz. What do you think??

**PS: I may or may not have painted my toenail after taking the initial picture and realizing I might scare young children if I left my disgusting feet as is.

One last plug! UPDATED

2011-04-15T11:01:00.000-05:00

The Relay for Life event is in 3 days, and I'm 81% to my goal, $65 away!! You can make an online donation as small as $10!!

I want to do some HUGE thank you's to those that have already donated!

Carolyn, you were the first one to donate, then you joined the team, competed in a 5K with me, and have never stopped supporting me!! Love ya girlie!!

Desiree, I have seen you grow leaps & bounds in the past two years, and am SO proud of the beautiful young lady you have become!

Annette, I'm eternally grateful to you for raising such an amazing son, that has been a wonderful husband and stellar father! Thanks for always believing in me!

Mary Cullen, my co-worker who knows my passion and never hesitated to show her support!

Nicole, I'm so grateful to have you in my life!! I love our conversations & take joy in seeing your life grow with Peter & my adorable nephew Malachi!

Vanessa, my wife/nursing school buddy, your continued support in every endeavor I taken on is not unnoticed. You are my ROCK!

Michelle, my ROCKIN' SIL who endures talking to me, even though she hates talking on the phone, and has been generous enough to allow me to move within 3 miles of her!

Jeannie, my fellow Kick-A Army wife, I can always look to you for a smile, sympathetic ear, or even a great laugh! Hoooah sista!

********************UPDATE********************
I made my goal!!!

I big thanks to Yohanna G., Jacqueline L., Carolyn (for your donation in Nik's name), David C., & Vanessa C.

I was literally brought to tears when I saw the generosity of so many of my family & friends. You all knew how important it was to me...and you supported me! Thank you really can't express my gratitude. You ALL rock!

WARNING: Mad Skilz Ahead

2011-04-13T08:48:00.003-05:00

So we've been working A LOT on getting the outside of the house looking good so we can post a picture for the listing. We have 3, yes THREE, full grown oak trees on our property, which makes for a lot of leaves.

We invested in a leaf blower awhile ago, which made Eric's job easy...but somehow I ended up having to pick up all the leaves (he's having pretty bad sciatic pain...which I can totally relate to...so I wanted to do my part). He also pressure washed the outside of the house & it looks ten times better!

Here's the pile of bags that I had the pleasure of bagging...at least what I could get done during nap time & when Eric got home from work!

I also trimmed the bushes by the front door, pulled weeds, laid the edging & planted flowers. For those that have been to my house in the last six months, you know what an undertaking this was! The pile of limbs that I took off the bushes was bigger than what was left! These bushes were literally touching our rain gutters before I began!

Then it was off to the backyard where decided to plan azaleas along the back fence line because there was NOTHING there...and it only gets indirect sunlight.

And, with the help of Miss Molly, who I ran into while shopping at Lowe's, I picked these hanging baskets to put in this corner.

So, my lack of blogging hasn't been because I didn't want to!! We've got a lot still left to do before I leave in less than two weeks.

I think everyone needs a good laugh!

2011-04-09T15:48:00.003-05:00

With all the crap going on right now, I felt it was my responsibility to share something that made me laugh so hard I almost cried.

Enjoy!!

It's all pretty good, but the if you want to get to the good stuff, start watching at 5:14.

It's all happening so fast!

2011-04-05T07:59:00.005-05:00

Last month the boys celebrated their 1st birthday!! I only invited a few friends over, that have truly become more like family, and we ate & watched the boys devour their cupcakes! Here is the practice cake I made...I forgot to take a picture of the one I made for the actual day...it pretty much looks the same!

Carter

Cooper

The boys with their cupcakes

Carter

Cooper

The fam

-------------------------------------------------------

Sorry about being so MIA lately, but the move is progressing a lot faster than we originally planned! We made a trip to NC this past week to do a little house hunting, and of course we fell in love with the second to last house we looked it. It's the right price, and only 3 miles away from my brother & his family!!

We got back Sunday night and have spent almost every waking moment preparing our current house to get on the rental market. Has anyone ever heard of AHRN.com?? It is a great, FREE, website for military families to list their rentals!!

Because of availability, I'll be leaving FL on the 24th (the day after my last day of work), and waiting there for Eric to finish all his schooling in Arizona. Please keep your fingers crossed that I'll be able to find a good job & childcare! I have a phone interview tomorrow!!!

Although I'm super excited to be moving back to NC & being near family...I think I'm going to put the cold weather on notice. I'll definitely miss the warm weather here, but I think my allergies will thank me for the move!

Oh Eric...really??

2011-03-24T13:48:00.003-05:00

So, Eric makes it his personal mission to embarrass me, a job at which he takes much pleasure in.

Since we've had kids it's gotten much worse. Whenever he watches the boys he purposefully mis-matches their clothes, and/or makes them have crazy hair.

With the boys camo-themed first birthday (photos to come later) I got some fake tattoos, and have regretted that decision since. Eric has since taken every chance he can to put them on the boys.

First, I asked him to get the boys dressed for their Dr. appointment. Later that night I undressed Carter to get him in ready for bed and found this:

I have to admit I laughed hysterically at first, but then wondered what the Dr. thought since she never said anything about it!

Then, last night we had some very fussy boys, and I occupied one while Eric got the other one dressed in PJs. I came to regret this decision. Right after they were asleep Eric started giggling and said that if the babysitter calls me at work tomorrow that I shouldn't be alarmed. Unfortunately, I knew what was coming.

This is what I found this morning:

Carter with a rank & tank tramp stamp

AND Cooper with a Tank on his leg...AND rank on both arms

If it didn't make me laugh so hard, I'd be mad.

What does your significant other do to embarrass you??

I Heart My Army Wife Life!

2011-03-08T10:45:00.000-06:00

That phrase ("I Love My Army Wife Life") is one of my many mantras. When I start to get frustrated with another "hurry up & wait" situation the military presents us, I try to stop and think how lucky I am.

I have been thinking about this A LOT lately. As we start to prepare the house for the rental market, I had a conversation with one of my main homies, Molly, & we started to discuss what would happen when I had to move. We resolved there would be a huge production of "ugly crying" (face red, eyes swollen, runny nose)...and I honestly started to tear up just thinking about it. I'm super excited to start our journey at our next duty station, but I'm so sad to leave so many amazing people behind.

In all the "bad" that comes from being a military wife, I've been afforded so many opportunities that I am truly grateful for. I was able to live on the beautiful island of O'ahu for 3 years! I lived off base, worked on the economy, picked up quite a bit of pigeon slang, learned some hula, and developed an unhealthy obsession with Aloha Shoyu, Coconut Syrup, Lomi lomi salmon & Coconut Macadamia Nut Tea. I've met people that have truly changed my life & love catching up with.

In "surviving" deployments & TDY's to Iraq, Afghanistan, Kuwait, Quatar, Jordan, Australia, Singapore & more, Eric and I have learned how to communicate. Whether it's a 5 minute conversation on a Satellite phone that echoes, letters written on 3x5 index cards, or chatting via IM or Skype, we know the importance of every minute. We have a mutual respect of each others roles in our family & how tasking they can be. This is NOT to say we don't disagree, um DUH we're married, but these separations have aided us in communicating our feelings/concerns effectively.

It seems like each move is bittersweet. Although I will eventually leave behind amazing people here, I know I'll learn and grow even more with the experiences that await me after the move! And, just to clarify, even though Eric is now an officer...I will forever be an Army wife... AKA Household 6!

-----------------------------------------------

No matter what branch you serve, the US Military is a family. The heinous act that took the lives of two airmen in Germany last week is a tragedy. The friends of Nicholas Alden have set up an online auction on Facebook to raise money for his family. Please take the time to click HERE and place a bid OR look in the info section to find out how to make a personal donation. Although the military has decent life insurance, it can take quite awhile to receive those benefits, and if you've ever buried a loved one, you know of the immediate expenses. So, please support this family in their time of need.

(if the link doesn't work, do a search for "Auction to Raise Funds for the Alden family")

Why I love my job

2011-02-27T11:25:00.005-06:00

It took me MANY years to decide what I wanted to do with my life. Eric was VERY accomodating and afforded me the time to sort things out by not pressuring me. I finally decided that I wanted to go into Nursing while he was deployed in Iraq for 13 months (I had a lot of time on my hands). I had the wonderful opportunity to be very involved with the FRG (Army's Family Readiness Group), and found true joy in serving others, even if it was just allowing a stressed wife time to vent.

Throughout Nursing School I was conflicted about what type of nursing I wanted to do. I fell in love with the ER due to the pace & the continual variety of people you see. Then, the summer before my 2nd year I was able to spend quite a few days in Labor & Delivery, and I fell in LOVE!

It is truly what I thought I wanted to do, but I new that being a new graduate the chances were slim to non that I would be able to work in that area. While in my last few weeks of nursing school I was able to interview for a position in Pediatrics. Due to the way my hospital works, this would not only allow me to work in a specialty area, but also float to the med-surg & post-surg which I took as a bonus so I would be able to stay well-rounded.

Over almost the past 2 years I have fallen in love with Peds. As in any career, sometimes a series of events can be disheartening...but then the sun comes out, and like in this book made for me by one of my patients, the rainbow brings hope!

"At the end of the storm, comes a beautiful rainbow."

"The magic rainbow is magic because it didn't rain first."

"The rainbow is beautiful"

"The flowers grow tall under the rainbow"

(close up of her message at the end)

Let the Battle Begin!

2011-02-21T15:49:00.005-06:00

Last week we discovered the Cooper had yet another double ear infection. So, I didn't think too much about him tackling Carter or throwing temper tantrums. But, as the days go on, I'm afraid they're allowing me a brief glimpse as to what the future holds.

Cooper has been caught pulling, crawling, collaring & all out tackling Carter this week. Now, you might think he is a bully...but I tend to think he's just getting even. Carter is already an accomplished walker, and has used his freedom to steal whatever toy Cooper is playing with, and has also been caught using him as a human stepping stool.

Although there has been an abundance of screaming (since they are both cutting their top two teeth) there has also been joyous moments of laughter, without any parents involved.

We've also been attempting to rid Cooper of the middle of the night feedings. So far, he's lasting until about 5am. Carter sleeps very soundly, unless woken up by Cooper. Also, the cry it out method has proven to cause me more difficulty than Cooper. It's not that it breaks my heart to hear him cry...it's frustrating because he cries until he pukes, then I have to wake up Carter so I can steam clean the carpet. It gets easier, right?

I can't believe my little guys will be one next month!

My reason to walk

2011-02-08T11:38:00.000-06:00

As many of you know, my Dad was diagnosed with Cancer in October. I was having a hard time dealing with the news, and my neighbor mentioned how she was doing the "Making Strides Against Breast Cancer" walk in the area & wanted people to join her. The boys and I decked out in pink & did the 5K. I'd have to say that the boys ended up being our little team mascots, as everyone wanted to take their picture. Terri even had their adorable pink onesies made for them that read "real men wear pink!"
I had a lot of fun, but was focused on making every penny I could, so I could go visit my dad. I finally made it to see my Dad in Arizona last month. My younger sisters drove out from Texas, one stayed with the boys (since Eric had to work) and the other flew with me to Arizona. It was a short trip but we were able to spend some good quality time with him and his family. He is surrounded by 8 pugs that were always entertaining. I learned a little about that area of Arizona he lives in when we visited the Desert Museum and was able to take him to a few Dr. appointments to give his wife a much needed break.

The visit was long enough to spend some good quality time, but far too short. When I got back I signed up to be part of Terri's team, the Cancer Cussin' Cuties. We all wear pink in remembrance of Terri's Mom that lost her battle with Breast Cancer when Terri was still a teenager.

I walk because I want more time. More time to visit with my Dad & his wonderful family. More time to allow my boys to meet & know their grandfather. More time to love.

So, here comes the plug.

We are participating in the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life here in Florida. I've already had one of my good friends, Carolyn, sign up for our team, and we are busting our butts with all kinds of fundraisers.
Even though I can't really do the fundraisers with all my bloggy buddies, I wanted to give you the opportunity to donate to our team! My amazing MIL, Annette & SIL, Desiree have already made donations! Every $1 helps, even if that's all you can spare.

We've all been affected, one way or another, by cancer. So, please help join the fight to help the ones we love celebrate more birthdays!

Click here to donate. You can be anonymous or use it to plug your blog/website! I promise a certificate of awesomeness, to include massive cool points, to whoever makes the largest donation!

Thanks,
Mary

We've got orders!!!

2011-02-02T16:19:00.004-06:00

For my non-military friends, this is something that us Army folk both look forward to, and dread at the same time. We are super excited because it means we won't be hanging in limbo anymore, and KNOW where we'll be for the next few years.

When Eric talked to his branch manager she said the current options were Italy, Ft. Bragg, NC and Alaska. I told Eric that if he got Alaska, I'd be waiting for him in Hawaii. We patiently waited 2 weeks and had heard nothing back from her...so today Eric called her....and found out...

We're going to Ft. Bragg!!!

We are both really excited. Eric will be able to stay airborne (and keep his jump pay) and my older brother & his AMAZING wife Michelle are currently stationed there (she was the first person I called)! Even though I really wanted to go to Italy, it will be a blessing to not have to try to sell the truck, and to stay stateside as we attempt to rent/sell our house.

When he told me what our report date was, my first thought was, "Michelle & I are going to have the BEST Halloween ever!"

My favorite signs

2011-01-28T02:24:00.001-06:00

There are many signs that make us laugh, think, or are simply confusing. Here are a few of my favorites:

I saw this one for the first time this summer in Alabama on our way to Tennessee. So, you've all been warned!

I took a picture of this one when I was in Kona (the big Island)...you just can't help but laugh!

This was Eric's Valentine's Day present a few years ago for the front of his truck!

I picked up this sign while we were at Ft. Benning. I've always wanted one, and they had exactly what I've been imagining!

This sign is courtesy of my SIL Desiree & MIL Annette. I posted on FB that I was sick of people ringing my doorbell while the boys were sleeping and that I "needed a sign that says Babies sleeping, GO AWAY!" I love you guys, and am lucky you understand me so well! I've been using it for the past 3 weeks, and we've yet to be interrupted during nap time!

How time flies!!

2011-01-27T09:34:00.003-06:00

On Tuesday I realized that I had signed up to work on the boys 1st birthday! I was in Arizona visiting my dad when I signed up for shifts, and I had other things on my mind. I'm lucky that the schedule JUST came out, and my shift can be covered!!

Where did the last year go?? The boys are now 10 months old! Carter has been walking for about 2 weeks and Cooper is crawling just as fast as Carter. They both have their bottom 2 front teeth, and start smacking their lips whenever they see you have food.

So, initially I wasn't going to throw them a party. Honestly, they won't really remember, they don't really have friends, and all of our family lives hundreds of miles away. But, then I realized that we have great friends, that might as well be called family, around here. So I need some ideas.

Eric will have the day off, and I'll have the day off before. I'm still debating whether or not I want to make a cake, or just order one. I figure, either way, giving each boy their own cupcake will be the way to go! Also, a friend brought up a good point...don't go over board on their first birthday, or I'll be trying to out do it every year after :o)

So, any ideas???

Running a little behind

2011-01-04T10:30:00.005-06:00

Eric graduated as the Distinguished Honor Graduate from his class in OCS a little over two weeks ago, and I'm desperately trying to play catch up!

They had a Ball two days before graduation, here is Sam (one of the amazing ladies I've had the chance of meeting) and me...Eric and I didn't get pictures because we're cheap, and I'm not loving how fat I still am.

Here is Eric after he was sworn in by his Bn Cmdr (who drove almost 4 hrs to be there!)

Eric's first salute by his buddy Kelly

Top 3 in the class

Eric receiving his award for being an all around pimp

I handed off the boys and ran over to get a decent picture of him after he sat down...everyone was staring at me but it's hard to take a picture while wrangling the twins!

Someone at work also said that I haven't posted any recent pictures of the boys, so for the "Carter & Cooper Fan Club" (coined by Kelly), your requests haven't fallen on deaf ears.

The boys

Cooper

Carter

Carter caught in the act of making out with his reflection at Gavin Hall (military lodging), Ft. Benning.

Cooper crawling around

Carter LOVES bath time, crawling around the tub with the occasional splashing...it's hard to get a picture of Cooper in the tub because of all the splashing, I don't want to ruin my camera!

Cooper is starting to catch up and is crawling everywhere (not just doing his Army high crawl), pulling himself up to stand, and is starting to walk along the couch and other furniture.

Carter has just started standing, unassisted, and taking up to two steps at a time...before he face plants.

The boys are above the 90th percentile in height, but sitting at the 20th percentile in weight. It's not from a lack of food, but just have those long slender frames. My hope is that they will both be over 6'!

Who's right anyway?

2010-12-23T05:24:00.001-06:00

We have lived in the Panhandle of Florida for about 5 years now. In this time, we have made no fewer than 20 trips to a specific city in which you must take a toll bridge, or drive an extra 20 miles (and about 50 minutes) on a one lane highway.

I always drive. Eric hates driving. But, when he wants to get on my good side, he'll volunteer to drive.

As we are headed to get the boys pictures taken with Santa, Eric volunteers to drive...I ask, "are you sure?" and he says yes.

Me: "this isn't your turn, get back in your lane."

Eric: "it would be so nice if they marked it, then I would never miss it!"

Me: "it is marked"

Eric: "it's not marked with a big sign that says 'Eric, turn here!'"

Me: reading the sign "mid-bay bridge next right"

500 ft later

Me: "toll bridge to ****** right lane"

50 ft later

Me: "mid-bay bridge right lane"

...long pause...

Eric: "the sign needs to be orange, that way I'd be able to see it!"

I figured I'd made my point, so there was no need to argue...and I'm sure we'll have the same conversation the next time he decides to drive. What amazes me is that he gets turned around in this city EVERYTIME we go...yet always rocks at his land nav for the Army!?!

Jen, would you be my BFF?

2010-12-22T09:12:00.006-06:00

Dear Miss Lancaster,

I must start by saying I have a total non-lesbian crush on you. I had heard about your first book Bitter is the New Black, quite a few years ago but only recently started reading your masterpieces. To say I love your writing would be an understatement. As I am now halfway through your third book, Such a Pretty Fat, I often find myself thinking what I would say, as you so vividly describe different situations, only to find out that you read my mind!

I really think we could be great friends. While you are too modest to say n-i-p-p-l-e and have a mouth that would make any soldier blush, I try my hardest to only use made up swears but have no problem discussing the special hugs that adults do when they really love each other.

I could bring a great balance, and have even been known to make my friends laugh. Just think about it.

Sincerely,
Mary

*I actually sent her this in an email...I'll let you know if I ever get a reply!

---------------------------------------------

I have a ton of pictures and events to write about, but I have been working every chance I get, because lets face it, I can't complain about not having money when I turn down a chance to work when Eric is home and I won't have to pay for a sitter!

Dear Velveeta

2010-12-01T22:45:00.004-06:00

To whom it may concern,

Growing up I only knew one kind of Macaroni and Cheese, and it was Kraft. We rarely used it as a side dish, but instead added hamburger meat, corn, & green beans to make it into a meal. I thought I was getting the good stuff until later in life I tasted the sweet nectar that is Velveeta Shells & Cheese. You became a staple in my home for many years, until my hubby and I decided we needed to shed some weight and filed for a restraining order.

Recently, we once again invited you back, but this time we went for the "healthier" option. And let me say...it just plain sucks! It's like you didn't even try! Also, there is only a 30 calorie difference per serving, and when a serving is over 300 calories is it really worth having the 2% variety?

So, I once again ban you from my house because, let's face it, my butt isn't getting any smaller and your low cal food isn't getting any better!

So many things to be thankful for!

2010-11-22T20:43:00.003-06:00

Staying positive isn't always easy for me, but over the last few weeks I've tried very hard to see the blessings in situations that would normally bring me down.

Last week I cried at work, for the first time in a year and a half. There were too many frustrated people, and I seemed to be in the middle without a way to please anyone. I've bumped up my status at work, and am working a lot more, with a lot less help at home. But, at the end of the day, I was told by a co-worker that I had done all I could do, "and you just can't fix stupid!" This not only made me smile, but having an outsiders perspective helped me realize that I had done my job.

Also, later in the week, a new nurse (who is new to the hospital, but has years of experience) told me that she enjoyed working with me, and that I should be a preceptor. It was just what I needed to hear at the end of a long work week!

I am thankful for a career that allows me to work with the public in a way to better their lives, along with meeting amazing people that I learn from on a daily basis! I also love seeing people I've taken care of at Wal-Mart (I live in a small town) and getting hugs from them!

I am thankful for a babysitter that keeps my mind at ease, and sends me cute photos of the boys during my shifts. And, I'm especially thankful for those fill-in sitters that step up at the last minute, and lighten my load!

I am thankful for my Sexy Beast, Best Friend, and love of my life! He works, and sacrifices, for not only his family but also his fellow man.

I am thankful for my beautiful boys whose smiles, laughter, and experiences make me smile when I think I have nothing left.

I am thankful for ALL my family! This includes immediate, extended, in-laws, and my many adopted families that I've met through my travels!

And, of course, my friends. My travels have allowed me the opportunity to meet some of the most amazing people that have changed my life forever! There is something so comforting about knowing that wherever we get stationed, there is a friend nearby!

Right now, I am so thankful that Eric has been granted a pass to come home for Thanksgiving. The boys are growing so fast, and seeing the pain in his eyes was almost too much the last time we were in Georgia, and he was recognizing all the new things they were doing, that he had missed out on.

Thanks to all of my readers, and to all the blogs I subscribe too! There is something very comforting in knowing that I'm not the only crazy one out there!

The BIG 250!

2010-11-08T20:41:00.004-06:00

Seeing as this is my 250th post (on Blogger) it should be extra awesome, right?! Well, I'll give it my best shot.

I'll start by letting you be privy to the most adorable babies on Halloween. Seriously, I think some of the trick-or-treaters were so intimidated by ~~Kelly dressed up and jumping out at them~~ the awesomeness of the boys costumes, they wouldn't even walk through the yard to get candy!
We also had the opportunity to attend Eric's SOCR (Senior Officer Candidate Review) and Branching Ceremony. SOCR was earlier in the afternoon and consisted of the OC's (Officer Candidate's) getting to not only ditch their black ascotsfor new spiffy white ones, BUT, and the most important but, ~~(hahaha...that's what she said!)~~, they no longer have to run everywhere they go.

The Branching ceremony took place a few hours later, and the OC's were able to select what branch (i.e. Armor, Infantry, Ordinance) based on an OML (Order of Merit List). This was comprised of test & PT (Physical Training) scores, and my baby was 7th! He stood up and yelled "I'm Senior Officer Candidate Salmond, and I select MI!" (Military Intelligence). This is exactly what he wanted, and it means that he'll finish up his schooling by spending 4 months at Ft. Huachuca, AZ.

I was going to post a picture of my new and improved Sexy Beast, but I figured it would ruin everyone else's marriage. But seriously...Eric got friggin CUT! He's lost an additional 11lbs (in the past 6 weeks), has a completely flat tummy, and sweet biceps and lats ~~that he couldn't wait to show me~~!

He has made it halfway through OCS and is on track to graduate on December 16th. We all know that this date will be super important for the soldiers, but it is also vitally important for us wives. I mean, come on! I just know that they SECOND Eric gets commissioned as an OFFICER, a beam of knowledge, prestige, classiness, ~~and the most important~~ power will be bestowed upon me. I honestly don't know how I've survived this long as an enlisted wife (which I'm pretty sure will become my latest swear)! I just can't wait!!

But, in all seriousness, I was able to meet some other amazing women on my weekend visit, and I look forward to ~~rubbing in their faces how much more I know~~ , ~~mentoring these lost souls,~~ sharing my experience with these ladies, and getting to know them better.

*Photos of Eric were taken by the class photographer and swiped from their Facebook page*

What happened to the service part of customer service?

2010-11-03T17:30:00.003-05:00

So, I've been trying to get a room on Ft. Benning for over a month. Eric will only have an on post pass on Friday & Saturday. I went ahead and made reservations at a ghetto motel downtown to make sure I'd have somewhere to stay, that was still in my price range.

Eric keeps bugging me to call EVERYDAY to see if something is available...which I've been doing. Yesterday I finally turn on the tears and they hand me over to a manager that says they are only making same day reservations, and to call or come in the day of. I told him I had two infants, and I didn't want to just show up and not have somewhere to stay. He said that they have family accomodations and to just call the same day.

So, I went ahead and called today (even though I won't be there til tomorrow) and was told that they have absolutely NO availability if you are traveling with babies, and I can't get a regular room for security reasons. I also could barely understand the person on the phone, and she was getting increasingly irritated when I kept asking her to repeat herself.

I wish everyone would be on the same page, because I'm so frustrated with the military's "customer service," or in reality, the lack thereof!

So, I have to decide whether to try to get my original reservation back, or wait and see. GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Self fulfilling prophecy

2010-10-27T14:28:00.004-05:00

I often have patients comment on my positive attitude. Most are surprised, and I have to admit that my attitude would not be as positive if I didn't try so hard to convince myself that it IS going to be a great day, and that I really am Darn Skippy :o)

I must also confess that my attitude has a lot to do with where I'm working. I truly love being in Pediatrics. Whether I'm taking care of all kids, a mix of adults and kids, or only adults (due to overflow from the other floors). My patient load is smaller, and I really feel as though I can provide the care that I would want my family member (or myself for that matter) to receive while in a vulnerable state. I've had patients cry (and almost make me cry with them), I've had them feel comfortable enough to share their frustrations with their health or other situations they are dealing with, I've had them yell at me, I've had them apologize, I've received hugs, and cards of appreciation.

So many times I leave a shift feeling as though I have failed in my duty to provide the emotional care that so many people need...but when I start out trying my hardest to have a positive attitude, everything seems to work out a little better.

Lately I've really enjoyed work. I'm blessed that I have someone to watch the boys that I trust completely, and that work has been flexible with me to pick up shifts when I need to.

I'm trying to stay positive, in light of recent events, in hopes that whatever comes my way will not totally derail me. My inner mantra is: just keep swimming, just keep swimming...all in hopes that I'll be able to keep my head above water and not just survive, but thrive.

Warning: This post is NOT for the faint of heart

2010-10-22T11:00:00.005-05:00

Meet William Wallace. I acquire him 2 years ago after a short visit to Disney World...which I'm guessing is a result from having too much fun.

Why did I name it William Wallace?? Because Molly said I should name it, and it is the most stubborn wort I've ever known!

I cut the head off many times, because it worked in the movies, but it grew back. I figured I must be dealing with a mutant so I tried freezing it off...4 times. But alas, it came back. The problem is the location. It's above my heel, on my Achilles tendon. Which makes for a painful experience whenever I wear sneakers or anything with a strap on the back.

Last Christmas, while visiting my brother in NC, he froze it off with liquid nitro. He said not to pop the horrible blister that would form...and I didn't. I waited, and waited, and waited...and the little booger quadrupled in size!

It was time for an all out war!

So, I got a dermatology consult and the chick decided she wanted to freeze it off herself, and see what happens. She spent the next 5-7 minutes freezing/thawing until I was numb to my heel. I was told to pop the blister, to start putting compound w on it in a week, and to follow up in two weeks. She said that if it was still there I would start putting a chemo cream, aldara, on it which should definitely do the trick.

So, here is W.W. about 2 hrs after the freezing

And here is W.W. after "popping" it, by cutting off the outside layer of dead skin...
And here is W.W. on the 3 day mark
(having all my left-overs in my nursing student skills kit has really come in handy!)

Sorry to gross you out, but it is the Halloween season, and I don't know any good ghost stories :o)

I know what everyone is thinking...I'm in desperate need of a pedicure! :o)
*********************************************

I want to thank everyone that kept my family in their prayers after my last post. The tumor did turn out to be malignant, but after the removal my Dad's personality is starting to emerge. He was discharge just 5 days after surgery to go home, and was progressing well enough to do outpatient radiation and therapy. It's going to be a long process, but I know his wife is by his side and taking excellent care of him.

Going MIA

2010-10-10T17:15:00.002-05:00

Last week I got a phone call from my older brother telling me that my Dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and was in pretty bad shape. He said it all came on very suddenly. This hit me like a ton of bricks...but also my radar went up.

Alzheimer's is a progressive disease and it doesn't just show up suddenly.

I called me Dad, and after a few minutes of him not being able to keep his train of thought longer than 3 seconds, I hung up and cried.

I then got the number of his wife, who is an LPN, and did some more digging. She told me that he totalled his truck a month ago and after the accident he didn't remember the accident or the other car. He refused to go to the hospital, and the only visible issue was a burn from the airbag.

Over the next two weeks he went downhill fast. They went to the Dr. and she asked him some questions, mainly focusing about his memory loss, and from his answers she diagnosed him with Alzheimer's....without doing a head CT, which can be definitive in the diagnosis.

It bugged me that a CT was never done, and I kept thinking that he probably had a stroke, which is why he had the accident to begin with.

Well, yesterday his wife called and said he was having difficulty walking and she got very scared and took him to the ER. They did a head CT and MRI, and found a golf ball size tumor in his frontal lobe. Due to the size of the tumor, his brain has shifted and there was a large amount of swelling.

After 24hrs in the ICU on steroids and anti-convulsants, he is doing much better and can recognize/remember people again. They have decided to operate Wednesday morning, which is his only real chance.

I have a friend coming into town on Tuesday, so I won't be alone, but please pardon my recent absence, and for a few more days. And please keep my Dad in your prayers.

*comments off*

Adventures in Commissary shopping

2010-10-04T06:41:00.002-05:00

Diaper bag. Check
Bottles. Check
Toys. Check
Double stroller. Check
...and here we go...

Upon entering, dart past the old guy on the scooter, and make a mad dash towards the shopping carts. Finding the perfect cart, that doesn't pull to one side, is KEY! Weave through the hundreds of other people that wait for payday to do their shopping and head for produce.

"oh, are they twins?"

Smile, nod, and find the least damaged apples, bananas, and whatever else is going for less than $1.20/lb. Veges here I come!

"are they twins?"

Keep smiling, nod and grab a large bag of carrots, lettuce, and English cucumber without coming to a complete stop.

Check list...

"are they twins?"

Come on, you can do it...smile! Nod! Continue to push the stroller with one hand, while pulling the cart behind you.

Ignore the people that give you dirty looks for your 'train' and all the space that it encompasses.
Try not to groan too loudly at the moron that parks their cart in the middle of the aisle and walks away. ~~Kick~~ Push said cart to the side, and continue to the next aisle.

"wow, are they twins?"

"No, they're brothers."

wait for the perplexed look...

"how far apart are they?"

"Two minutes"

Try not to feel guilty for the smart comment as I walk away and check the list again.

Okay, we're in the home stretch...dairy section is ahead.

Wade through the sea of shopping carts that stupid bottleneck the newest renovation has created, and grab milk, cheese, etc.

Okay, head to the check out...and get in line...keep waiting...then get yelled at to head to the specific register I'm told.

Pull out ID, wait for cashier to roll her eyes and ask "paper or plastic?" Then, watch the baggers smash your bread, bruise your fruit, and put 12 cans of soda in a single plastic bag.

"are they twins?"

Head to the parking lot where I attempt to remember where I parked. Tell the bagger they must wait while you turn the car on, the AC, get the boys back in their car seats, fold up the double stroller and put it in the trunk first. Get more dirty looks when you ask for the frozen/cold items to be put IN the car (b/c they didn't bother to pack them that way). Hand over $3, get in the car...breathe...and wonder why you made the trip in the first place.

*I heart my Army wife life*

Today should be better, since I have someone watching the boys. My goal is to be in and out in under 20 minutes...I think I'm up to the challenge!

The funk...I hear it's going around

2010-09-20T15:59:00.006-05:00

I've spent the past two weeks in pre-mourning. Eric left Sunday morning for OCS (Officer Candidate School) and will be gone until just before Christmas. We've done separations from 6 weeks-13 months, and no matter the length of separation, it just plain sucks. Mainly, I've been dreading not having help. Help with cleaning, food, and especially with the boys. I know I will survive, but it isn't something I'm looking forward to.

So, I have some advice for all (two) of my readers. If you live near ANY military bases/posts, there are women that need help. Don't offer vague services, instead:

-Call and invite their kids over for a sleepover.
-Invite them to go grocery shopping together (whether it's at Wal-Mart or the commissary).
-Call and tell them you are coming over the next day to clean the gutters/mow the lawn, or any other chore that the husband would normally do.
-Call just to chat.

I know there are more (and for my military wives out there, share!!) but these were some of the things I remember doing/helping with during our last deployment. I'm not begging for help, but I know how I am, and unless I have a day & time for help, I'm not inclined to ask for it.

---------------------------------------------

On a lighter note, one of my bloggy buddies recently did a post on Vagina Power. This made me laugh hysterically and also reminded me of frequent conversation I have with a close friend about the "Magic Wand" and all the power that goes with it.

This power enables the man to always be right (no matter if it is your area of expertise or not), have the last word, and the ability to phrase scenarios so the blame is forever one someone else...just to name a few. And just today we were discussing those men that like to wave their magic wand around in public b/c it's under lock and key at home. How have you seen the "magic wand" used lately?

---------------------------------------------

And, on an even better note, I have decided to host a table at a tea party benefit. One of the nurses that I have had the pleasure of knowing for a few years, has cancer and is unable to work while getting chemo. So, two of the nurses I work with have put together this tea party benefit! I've decided to go with a Hawaiian theme (b/c as it has started to cool down, it makes me miss HI even more) and I'm going to serve my FAVORITE herbal tea, Coconut Macadamia Nut, and plan on making my double-decker pineapple upside-down cake, chocolate haupia tarts, pineapple-macadamia nut bread, pineapple scones, mango butter...and anything else I can come up with. (I so wish I could get my hands on some poi to make rolls) So, I have 4 seats left at my table to sell. If you are in the Crestview area and want to have great food, conversation, and entertainment (Dr. Cunningham will be singing) then let me know! It is November 20th from 1830-2100 @ the Crestview Community Center, $20 a ticket (which is less than you would probably spend seeing a movie). Also, if anyone has great recipes, or ideas please pass them along.

Review, but no giveaway

2010-09-15T21:08:00.005-05:00

I know, I know. You were hoping I would give away something other than cool points, but I'm cheap and don't have the connections to get stuff for free.

While I was still pregnant I asked many people about what they preferred, slings/wraps/peekaroo, and my SIL, Michelle, said a wrap was the way to go. So I ignored her and found two slings that I wanted to try because they just seemed easier than a wrap. I purchased a Hug-a-Monkey sling, and was less than thrilled. It didn't feel like there was enough fabric to safely hold the boys, wasn't adjustable (which I knew before I bought it) and I got the wrong size. So, I set out to find a better one and purchased a Maya wrap (which is really a sling). Cooper hated it from the beginning, but Carter didn't mind, until he didn't want to stay in a safe position for it anymore and wiggled out. So, once again I had to resort to using harnesses that dug into my shoulders & gave me a headache...not good.

My other SIL, Sarah, mentioned awhile ago that she was taking pictures for her friend for a new website, So Nurturing, and the great wraps she made. I was meaning to visit the site, but kept forgetting.

After spending a Saturday holding the babies while we were out and about, I knew couldn't do it again (I've had crazy pain in my hands/wrists since I was 6 months pregnant, and frequently drop things).

I went to the site and purchased one of the cuddle soft wraps ($45, without the matching hat) in Teddy bear brown.

And, I decided to let Mr. Fussy Pants (aka Cooper) be the judge.He loved it!! And, it doesn't dig into my neck, is a lightweight fabric, AND is available in super cute colors! Also, I was terrified about being able to tie it right, but the website has great step by step pictures that even I can follow. Oh, and it also folds up small enough to fit into the smallest diaper bag.

So, if you have a little one, or need a gift for a baby shower (or want to buy me the one in soft black bubble so I can have one to match any outfit...I mean...for the other baby) check them out. Shipping is very reasonable, and it was shipped within a week, and at my house 3 days later.

ALSO, if you are in the Olympia, WA area and in need of a fabulous photographer...check out Sarah, not only is she an awesome photographer, but an absolute sweetheart.

6 Months!

2010-09-14T11:50:00.004-05:00

.Saturday the boys were officially 6 months old...which makes me 6 months older as well *sigh* Carter decided to commemorate this occasion by doing his version of crawling. He gets up on his hands and knees, pushes forward with his legs, lands back on his tummy & repeats. His motivation for this...getting close enough to Koa to grab his paw, watch Koa walk to the other side of the floor, so Carter turned around and started again.

They also had their check up yesterday. Carter is 27.74" and 16lbs 13oz. Cooper is 28.5" and 17lbs 10oz. They are both growing very well, and soon we hope to switch them off Nutramigen ($23 a can = almost $600/month) to a less expensive formula!

(if you notice, Cooper's hair is getting really long...and it's starting to resemble Kate Gosselin's bad haircut! He may get that high & tight Eric has been wanting very soon.)

First, and foremost...

2010-09-11T09:40:00.003-05:00

I don't think it could have been said better.

the address from Pres. Bush:

Good evening.

Today, our fellow citizens, our way of life, our very freedom came under attack in a series of deliberate and deadly terrorist acts. The victims were in airplanes or in their offices: secretaries, business men and women, military and federal workers, moms and dads, friends and neighbors. Thousands of lives were suddenly ended by evil, despicable acts of terror. The pictures of airplanes flying into buildings, fires burning, huge -- huge structures collapsing have filled us with disbelief, terrible sadness, and a quiet, unyielding anger. These acts of mass murder were intended to frighten our nation into chaos and retreat. But they have failed. Our country is strong.

A great people has been moved to defend a great nation. Terrorist attacks can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of America. These acts shatter steel, but they cannot dent the steel of American resolve. America was targeted for attack because we're the brightest beacon for freedom and opportunity in the world. And no one will keep that light from shining. Today, our nation saw evil -- the very worst of human nature -- and we responded with the best of America. With the daring of our rescue workers, with the caring for strangers and neighbors who came to give blood and help in any way they could.

Immediately following the first attack, I implemented our government's emergency response plans. Our military is powerful, and it's prepared. Our emergency teams are working in New York City and Washington D.C. to help with local rescue efforts. Our first priority is to get help to those who have been injured, and to take every precaution to protect our citizens at home and around the world from further attacks. The functions of our government continue without interruption. Federal agencies in Washington which had to be evacuated today are reopening for essential personnel tonight and will be open for business tomorrow. Our financial institutions remain strong, and the American economy will be open for business as well.

The search is underway for those who were behind these evil acts. I have directed the full resources of our intelligence and law enforcement communities to find those responsible and to bring them to justice. We will make no distinction between the terrorists who committed these acts and those who harbor them.

I appreciate so very much the members of Congress who have joined me in strongly condemning these attacks. And on behalf of the American people, I thank the many world leaders who have called to offer their condolences and assistance. America and our friends and allies join with all those who want peace and security in the world, and we stand together to win the war against terrorism.

Tonight, I ask for your prayers for all those who grieve, for the children whose worlds have been shattered, for all whose sense of safety and security has been threatened. And I pray they will be comforted by a Power greater than any of us, spoken through the ages in Psalm 23:

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil for you are with me.

This is a day when all Americans from every walk of life unite in our resolve for justice and peace. America has stood down enemies before, and we will do so this time. None of us will ever forget this day, yet we go forward to defend freedom and all that is good and just in our world.

Thank you. Good night. And God bless America.

Please take the time to remember what our men and women are fighting for, the sacrifices they've made, and continue to make.

A crap ton of fun

2010-09-09T16:24:00.004-05:00

Sorry for the weird title, but I'm in a weird mood...and it made me laugh!

My wonderful little sister was in town the past two weeks, and it has been such a blast!! She was such a huge help with the boys, and it was nice to talk to an adult all day without having my phone permanently attached to my ear.

We didn't do anything big, but had many laughing fits reminiscing about our childhood and being stupid just for the sake of being stupid. It was great!

We also had the opportunity to help out with a retirement party for a friend of Eric's that has completed 20 yrs of service in the Army. Carolyn, his wife, and I decided about six weeks ago that the traditional phallic shaped cake had been done enough...it was time for *cough* bigger and better things. So after much deliberation, here is the end result:
I was so happy with the end result, and I wouldn't have gotten this far without the help of The Cake Cow, aka Jessica G. (not sure if she wants to take credit for helping me or not). I practiced making different elements of the cake twice, and made changes as I went along. I used white cake with chocolate butter cream for the base of the cake, and red velvet cake with vanilla butter cream for the top.

We had a BBQ at the beach the day before the big party, and the boys had their first encounter with the ocean.

Cooper is now a huge fan of water, and even had a blast on Monday at the pool at the Ranger Camp with Eric.

I have a lot of catching up to do with blog posts, so please be patient with my comments...they're coming, slowly but surely!

A little of this and that...

2010-08-31T11:14:00.004-05:00

If you've noticed that I've been a little MIA from the wonderful world of blogging, this photo might explain why:
Cooper is teething...and none of us are happy campers. For the most part, it isn't as bad as I expected (knock on wood), but I'm not naive enough to think the worst is over.

My little sister also surprised me last week with a request to come visit before she starts school next month...ummm heck yeah! She has been a monumental help with the boys, and made it possible for me to pick up a few extra shifts before Eric leaves for OCS. And speaking of OCS......it has taken over my dining room table (granted, it used to be covered with my misc crap). Since we are stationed at an Air Force Base, Eric has had to make trips to Ft. Benning, GA (4 hrs away & where OCS is located) to commandeer all the necessary items on his packing list. And after copious amounts of money, and one more trip tomorrow, he should have everything he needs. Have I mentioned how much I'm NOT looking forward to being alone for 3 months, BUT the outcome will be well worth it when he graduates on Dec 16th!

And, on a very happy note, I stumbled onto the Halloween costumes for the boys while looking for bottles online.

So, the question is:
Great costumes, or the greatest?

Adventures in military lodging

2010-08-24T15:08:00.005-05:00

Eric's brother was graduating from AIT (Advanced Individual Training) at Fort Gordon, GA and since we are only seven hours away, we wanted to be there for it. I called Ft. Gordon lodging (b/c I'm cheap) and all they had available was a "suite," which in Army lodging terms means the cockroaches where top hats and little white gloves. I asked if they had pack-n-plays available, and she said they had cribs. I informed her that I had two infants, so I would be needing two. She said to just ask for them at check in. I also asked if they did late check out, or 1/2 days and I was told no and check out was promptly at 1000.

We headed out early since we discovered that a normal seven hour drive takes about nine with the boys. They boys did great, but got a little fussy towards the end of the drive, so Eric hopped in the back seat and entertained them for the last two hrs of the drive.

We pulled in and I went inside to check us in. The girl checking me in needed a few lessons on how NOT to be a rude whore. When I told her that I would be needing two cribs she said, "I don't even know where they would be or if we even have any." I was none too thrilled. When she made the room key card and handed it to me, I asked if I could have two (which I didn't think was an uncommon request), she scoffed, rolled her eyes then made another. Then, after I signed all my paper work I see a sign for 1/2 day prices. So I asked how that worked, which I'm assuming was too much for her to deal with because she just continued to repeat that I had paid for two full nights. I finally cut my losses and started to walk back to the car....in the monsoon that started as soon as I was out of the building.

When we walked in our room I was surprised at how nice the decorating was, but was brought back to reality when I found food in the sink of the kitchenette, the sink drained crazy slow, and the curly black hair on our 'clean' towels. A few hours later I noticed a guestbook on the dresser in the bedroom. Everyone raved about how great their stay was, how clean it was, and how they couldn't wait to come back again. All I could think about was leaving a REAL message about how things really were.

I continued to ponder about what I wanted to write, so others could be warned. But then when we brought the boys in the check in staff turned soft and one of them went to the attic and found a little ghetto crib that would at least fit one of the boys. We pulled the mattress off the hide-a-bed and blocked off the edges with pillows...but Cooper still ended up rolling off and crying at 0100.

Ben is the tall one on the stage (the theater was really dark and I don't have a professional camera)

It was great to spend some time with Ben and be there for his graduation. We ate good food and put the diet on hold for those two days.

As we were packing up I came up with the perfect thing to write in the guestbook: "Satanic forces are at work here" (from The Gilmore Girls when they stayed at a crazy B&B)...but I chickened out because you were supposed to write your name and where you were from. I guess I could have signed it LG and said I was from Stars Hollow, CT...well, maybe next time.

I sat in the back seat with the boys on the way home for a short time, and in the beginning Cooper gave me this look
But he later warmed up and was as smiley as Carter...and they boys enjoyed having someone to interact with on the long ride home.

Carter vs. Carrots

2010-08-16T10:24:00.002-05:00

Not sure which one won...

Were they really the good ole days???

2010-08-09T16:05:00.006-05:00

My 10 yr High School reunion was last weekend. When I first got the invitation months ago, I honestly laughed. Maybe you remember those wonderful years of partying with friends, football games, and dances....me, not so much.

I do have to say that it wasn't all bad, but somehow most of my friends were either older or younger than me. I did have a hand full of friends that I talked to on a regular basis in my grade, but I mainly hung out with a group of kids from church and I was one, of maybe, two in my grade.

I moved to WA state the summer before I started HS, which made for a very awkward freshman year. My older brother was a senior, and I was the only girl my age in my ward (congregation). This made for a very sucky freshman year, and pretty much my whole 4 yrs there.

So, you can imagine my delight when friends posted pictures of the reunion on Facebook. Is it bad that I felt good that so many of the popular guys (aka douche bags) were balding, fat, or just looked weird...and that I wished a few of the girls were fat?

I am not bitter...I am just a different person now, and really have no desire to relive those days when one girl spread rumors that I got a boob job (b/c her's were saggy, and she was just jealous) or when one of the unnamed guys above decided to peel the tin foil off gum wrappers and throw all the little pieces in my hair.

I have to say that there were a few people that I would have liked to catch up with, but the majority of the people there probably wouldn't remember me or I'd have nothing to say to them.

And, I think that even if I still lived in WA, I probably wouldn't have attended anyway. I'm so much more happy with how my life has turned out, that I have no desire to see the people that made me feel like poo!

Did anyone actually enjoy High School??

The "DIE" in diet

2010-08-09T09:25:00.003-05:00

To say I was in a bad mood last week, would be a vast understatement. I snapped at Eric, I had no patience, and everything seemed to frustrate me. It was the first week of my diet.

Eric and I decided to do the Biggest Loser Club online again, because we both had great results when we did it a few years back. It took me 10 months, but I was able to lose the last 55 lbs (as you can tell, I don't lose weight quickly at all).

I was hungry all the time, and all I could think about was chocolate, ice cream, cookies, and all the other wonderfully fattening treats that I couldn't have. Being hungry is right up there with being nauseous...it just sucks!

I don't mind the food at all, it's the portions (or lack thereof) that can be discouraging. Our fridge now looks like this (about 90% fresh fruits & veges)

All that being said, I feel better now that the first week is over. I'm using a lot of seasonings I've never used before (b/c when your snack is a cucumber you have to spice it up somehow), and I feel better.

Now, I just need the weather to cool off a bit so I can start walking again with the boys. (when it's over 90 degrees, I refuse to subject the boys to it for an extended length of time, no matter how fat my butt is!)

Oh boy, Oh boy

2010-08-05T06:02:00.001-05:00

The following takes place between 3 Aug 1800 and 4 Aug 0500 (in the voice of Jack Bauer)

1800
Cooper: Hey Carter, I'm fading fast! Who's gonna wake up first tonight?
Carter: I don't know. I really appreciate you letting me sleep through most of the night though.
Cooper: It's the least I can do bro! Plus, I love getting back at mom for making us watch Gilmore Girls all day.
Carter: I know, right! But, you have to admit, some of those chicks are hotties.
Cooper: "Oy with the poodles, already!"

1900
Cooper: What did you think of those bananas?
Carter: They are so much better than that white stuff we've been getting!
Cooper: True that, but Koa seems to be in attack mode the second the spoon leaves my mouth!

0200
Carter: I am Carter the 1st I am, Carter the 1st I am I am...
Cooper: zzzz zzzz zzzz
(mom enters room)
Carter: Yo wassup momma? I had a great nap and I'm ready to play...why are you stuffing my pacifier back in my mouth?? I WANT TO PLAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

0230
Cooper: I am Cooper the 1st I am, Cooper the 1st I am I am...
Carter: zzzz zzzz zzzz
(mom enters room)
Cooper: Yo momma wassup? I just figured that since Carter finally fell asleep, it was my turn to wake up and play. Don't mind me, I'm just gonna chill in crib and sing to Pooh and the gang. But honestly, that Tigger is kinda freakin me out!

...and the cycle continued until I fed them at 0500, then they both fell asleep til 0630. It was a fun night...

When I took the boys to their 4 month check up (2 weeks late), Cooper weighed in at 15lbs 14oz and Carter at 15lbs 4oz. They are also above the 95th percentile in height at a whopping 27"! I wonder who they get that from :o)

The great debate

2010-08-04T07:33:00.000-05:00

...to cut, or not to cut...

Ever since we found out we were having boys, Eric keeps talking about how cute they would be with a high & tight (see pic to left or look at our wedding pic on the right). I agreed, but stated that they would need to have some hair first.

Well, they both came out with full heads of hair (and although Carter's fell out @ 1 mo. it grew back). Cooper's hair has been touching his ears since birth, and it's driving Eric crazy. He also has random hairs, on the top of his head, that are up to 3" long. He is now insisting that he needs a haircut.

I think it's a little early. I held him off initially by saying, "wait til their 3 mo." and now saying, "wait til their 6 mo."

I don't know if I can hold him off any longer because he is making comments about it on a daily basis. I have a feeling that one of these mornings when I come home from work, Cooper will have a high & tight. We both agreed that Carter's head isn't the right shape to pull off the same style :o)

Getting dirty with the girls

2010-08-02T09:05:00.008-05:00

0600: wake up
0625: really wake...put on Eric's old BDU pants, one of his under armor shirts, and pull on my old work boots
0645: do a mental check, did I forget anything??
0655: meet Terri & Kayla outside
0700: load in the truck and head out to Camp Rudder...the Florida phase of Army Ranger School
0730: awesome breakfast in the DFAC...all for the low low price of $2.70!
0830: the start of an HOOOOOAH day!!

This year I once again braved the swamps in NW Florida, and brought along my neighbors, Terri & Kayla, for the experience. I knew that this would be my 4th, and final, appearance so I wanted to make it count!

We had a blast, and I have to say that Terri was probably the most excited person there! She was always at the head of the crowd when moving from place to place, and touched every snake and alligator she could get her hands on.

We shot guns...

crossed the water on a rope bridge...

attached to our safety lines...

ate MRE's...

paddled down the Yellow River in Zodiacs...

and brought a little of the swamp back with us...

We then headed to the showers to get ready for the BBQ. And...I jinxed myself. I kept telling the girls that every year I forget something (bra, underwear, shoes). I was so proud of myself at the beginning of the morning because I packed my bag the night before. So, all clean I take my bag to the bathroom to change...which is when I discovered I shouldn't have been so confident. I always say "go big, or go home," and I did just that. I forgot my jeans. I was mortified, and laughing hysterically. One girl suggested I just wrap a towel around my waist and people will just think I have a swimsuit on. So, I did that, but headed to the little shopette to hopefully buy some shorts or pants...and they were closed. I then did the walk of shame back to the truck, opened my filthy trash bag with my swamp clothes, and put my nasty pants back on.

We hung around for about 30 min but they were running behind on getting the food ready, so we decided to just grab our t-shirts and head home.

I had a great time, and look forward to this event every year. Thanks ladies for going with me!!

View all the pictures of our adventure here:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=465403&id=736160042&l=ddc972e449

My very first GIVEAWAY!!!

2010-07-29T14:38:00.003-05:00

(Can't you just imagine Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah's couch?)

Since it seems that I'm the only one not doing, or entering, giveaways...I thought it was time to jump on the band wagon.

I've put a lot of thought into this, and after many sleepless nights I have decided to give away something very near and dear to my heart. Cool points!!

Yes, you read that right! The winner will receive 18,000 Cool Points (I always handed them out to the kids in my Sunday School class, and knew you would appreciate them as much as they did).

The following tasks are worth one entry (please leave a comment, birthday, & SSN for each entry)
*go next door and tell your neighbor that their haircut sucks
*if you have a dog
*if you think your dog is cooler than mine (must include 500 word essay, single spaced in APA format) *blog about how much you love giveaways (leave link and pin # for your highest limit credit card)
*tweet about the how much you love shoving bamboo shoots up your finger nails (leave link and spouses SSN)
*follow me to the grocery store and push the cart or the double stroller (no need to identify yourself before you run off with the boys)
*friend me on facebook (leave email address and password)
*honk and yell at a random stranger in a foreign language

2 entries
*call your mom and tell her a secret from your teenage years that she doesn't already know
*lick the ground (include picture and birth certificate)
*do the chicken dance in walmart (must include video and mail in passport)

100 entries
*join my blog frog community and don't be offended when I don't follow you back.

Cool points will be sent via ESPN or something (name the movie), no refunds or exchanges.
**Actual value of cool points are 1/100 of a penny, but are infinitely better than any monetary gain.**

A License to Kill

2010-07-27T09:47:00.003-05:00

I may be mistaken, but I swear in our wedding vows I heard..."to love, honor, and kill anything that freaks Mary out..." (actually I don't really remember a lot of what was said, but I'm adding this in if we ever decide to renew our vows)

Last night as I ~~stumbled back to bed~~ joyfully returned from the babies' room I realized nature was calling and turned left into our bathroom. This is when the assault started. A horribly nasty, huge, vicious bug ~~was walking across the floor~~ raced towards me. I yelled "Eric, there is a huge bug in the bathroom!!!" (I might want to point out it was 0200). He groaned and rolled over. Again I yelled, "ERIC!!" I was in dire straights with my life hanging in the balance and he was rolling over and groaning, where is the love??

He eventually ~~stormed~~ leisurely walked into the bathroom picked up the monster with some toilet paper and flushed it down the toilet.

All was well in the world...but I couldn't bring myself to use that toilet, so I went into the spare bathroom. I couldn't get the picture out of my mind of this huge bug swimming back up through the pipes to seek it's revenge (I get goosebumps and the shivers just thinking about it).

I thought that killing things was innately driven into the male species, but I guess it has a time clock, without 24 hr support.

Never say Never

2010-07-25T02:34:00.003-05:00

My distaste for cooking is something I don't try to hide. My sister even mentioned that she told her kids to be grateful they have one home cooked meal a day b/c they could be living with me!

It's just not something that I've ever really enjoyed doing on a regular basis. I've always seen it as a mundane chore, therefore I ~~rebel, kick, scream~~ barter to get out of it. I admit that I have, on occasion, enjoyed making dishes for parties or functions. But, the everyday need for this has made me despise cooking like the ever growing piles of laundry that spontaneously multiply (and consequently never makes it out of the basket).

However, I made dinner twice in the past 4 days (and made corn bread & banana bread). Eric has a 4-day weekend, so I signed up to work all 4 days, and I've enjoyed switching roles. Now, I didn't make anything fancy (today I made chicken stir-fry) but when given the option of taking care of the boys or cooking...I chose cooking.

It's nice to have a change of pace, and after 5 straight days of diapers, bottles, and crying...the stove and work was what I needed. (What am I going to do when Eric leaves in September for 3 months?!?!)

Don't be alarmed, this isn't something I plan to take on full time, but it wasn't so bad. After all, I am not ready to give up my throne as the Queen of TV dinners!

The giggles and more

2010-07-19T13:49:00.004-05:00

Times, they are a changing...

Over the past week the boys have really started to notice one another and interact with each other. Every morning when they wake up, I put them both in the crib together for what I call "brother-brother time." They always end up turning on their sides facing each other and talk & play for the next 30 minutes or so. This is what I have been waiting for. This brings me hope that once they start moving around more, they will be able to entertain each other...but also get into trouble together.
For some reason the boys enjoy being on the changing table. When we first brought them home they screamed every time their diaper was changed, but now they laugh and squeal. And, as you've seen in previous videos, Eric loves to be silly with them...and only he can make them laugh this hard (I just can't seem to get the same reaction from them).

Also, the boys seem drawn to this panda on their gym toy. We have about a million things hanging from there, but both boys grab (and as shown below) suck on the feet of the Panda...maybe it's the color contrast?

I will NOT be mocked!

2010-07-14T08:58:00.003-05:00

Dear cat,

I understand that your life is probably not your choosing. It if was up to you, you'd probably be sitting in someones Florida room, sun bathing, while being fed tuna out of a crystal glass. But guess what, life isn't always fair.

Perfect case and point. Is it fair that when my dog thought he was going into his 'safe' (fenced in) backyard, for his morning stroll, that he would be attacked (by you) the minute he made it out the doggy door? Is it fair that I have to clean up cat poop from my front yard or deal with the horrible smell? Is it fair that I have to deal with the smell of cat pee on the roof of my car, or dirty paw prints down my windshield?? I think not!

It took two days, catching your partner in crime yesterday, and you getting the bait without triggering the trap. But today...you will mock me no longer. You laid in my yard all day yesterday and walked around the trap without getting caught. But today, I WIN!

So long, farewell, Auf wiedersehen, adieu!

How I'm scarring my children for life

2010-07-10T09:19:00.004-05:00

I started laughing hysterically when Carter was sucking on his hands so hard that he gagged himself and milk not only came out his mouth, but was shooting out of his nose.

Cooper has such a pretty face, and I've imagined putting a headband with one of those giant bows/flowers and seeing if anyone would be able to tell that he was a boy.

I have been accidentally continuing to call Carter a window licker.

I laughed when Eric was flapping Carter's ears like dumbo and flying him around the living room.

I've given the boys nicknames from characters from Mario Brothers and South Park.

I subject them to the Glee Soundtrack ~~all~~ once a day. And...I sing along and it makes the boys ~~laugh at me~~ smile!!

I don't hold the boys to get them to sleep. I don't have enough arms, and I figure that if they are tired enough, they'll fall asleep without being held.

I let Koa sleep in bed with me, but not the boys.

BUT, I did refuse to let Eric give the boys a high and tight haircut...I told him he had to wait till they were at least 6 mo :o) I should get some points for that, right?

I'm Amazed by You

2010-07-08T11:11:00.005-05:00

9 years ago I married My Sexy Beast. It all started the December of 2000 when I noticed a freakishly tall dude at FHE, and was intrigued. He also had a military haircut, which rendered me helpless. My friend that was VERY forward said, "come with me to talk to that guy, he's really cute!" So I did, found out a little about him and nothing more.

Then at a dance that next week they called me up to the DJ's table (where Eric happened to be hanging out) b/c they wanted help picking music to line dance to. I gave them some input and commented that they shouldn't play so many slow songs b/c I was sick of standing around and not dancing. So, that next slow song Eric hopped down from the stage and asked me to dance. We chatted, then after we went out with his cousin and my friend "Rich" (real name: Cindy) to Shari's (like a Denny's but 10x better!!!). We had a great time talking and just hanging out.

Then at the Christmas service Eric sat with me. We talked back and forth for the next few weeks...seeing as he was in Ranger Bn at the time, he was gone a lot!

On Jan 13, 2001 we had our first date. We went to see "Finding Forrester" and it was lame, but I remember how cool it was that when he opened a door for me I literally could walk right under his arm. Height has always been sexy to me.

The there was yet another church dance, but this time Eric ignored me, and asked pretty much everyone else to dance but me. I was furious! So, once I got home I called him and said, "Hey, it's Mary. I thought I made my intentions fairly clear...if not, I like you. Just curious where you stand." (bold right!!) He went on to say how he had just gotten out of a long relationship before me met me and was just looking for friendship. I said okay, but was really hurt. But, thought, okay...let's be friends. I kept my options open and started talking to other guys.

He was out of town for about 10 days, and as leaving my Astronomy class that night I had a voicemail from him. I didn't call him back. The next morning as I was walking to class he called me. I was cordial, but stated that it was cold outside and that is the only place I get reception, so I'd have to call him later. And...I didn't.

I went over to my friends house that afternoon after class as we planned on what we were going to wear to the dance that night when Eric called me. We talked for about 2 hrs, and he asked if I was planning on going to the dance that night. I told him that one of the guys from the singles branch was coming over and we were all going to ride with him to the dance (it was about an hour north). He asked if he could follow us. This surprised me seeing as he was already 30 min north of us, and would be seriously back tracking, but I told him he was welcome to come.

I was determined to look extra cute that night. I curled my hair, put on make up (which I still rarely do) and put on my favorite shirt. When I was done getting ready he was already at my house (my house pretty much had a revolving door for everyone's friends). I said we were all riding with Daniel, but he asked if I would ride with him. I cleared this with my friends, and hopped into his car.

The entire ride I talked with him like I would one of my girlfriends. I told embarrassing stories about my childhood (and teenage years) as did he, and we laughed and listened to country music the whole way.

About 2 min before we reached the church (where the dance was held) Eric says, "Oh, and by the way, I really do like you." I was in SHOCK!! I was rendered speechless and just sat there until the car came to a stop. I hopped out and ran over to my friends and we ran to the bathroom to discuss what just happened (typing this I'm thinking about how stupid all teenage girls act).

I danced mainly with Eric that night, about an hr after being there he wanted to leave, so we headed back to my house. We sat on my couch, watched TV and had our first kiss at my door as he was leaving. (Feb 2nd, BTW)

Eric spent almost every weekend he was home at my house. In March he told me he loved me, and I literally had an asthma attack! We laugh about this now all the time.

In April we were sitting in my room talking about where we thought our relationship was headed, when we hear my little sister through the wall singing:
"Meet me at the altar in your white dress
We ain't getting no younger, we might as well do it
Been feeling you all the while girl I must confess
Girl let's just get married, I just wanna get married." (Let's Get Married by Jagged Edge)

We both started laughing hysterically. We continued to talk about it over the phone as he left soon after for a school in GA for 6 weeks. And, while he was gone we decided to get married.

I set everything up on my end, picked out invitations, a dress, flowers, cake. And continued to tease him that eventually I would need a ring. Because of his ever changing schedule I had less than two months to plan everything. I went ring "browsing" with a mutual friend of ours and anxiously awaited his return on June 5th (one month before the wedding).

He called me the day before he was coming home and said his mom wanted to come to the airport with me to get him, and he was picking me up some flowers. I thought, whatever, okay. Then when I arrived at his parent's house EVERYONE wanted to come with us. I was quite annoyed (in my defense, I had all four wisdom teeth extracted the week before, I was still swollen and bruised badly, and smelled like clove oil b/c they had to pack the massive holes in my jaw with gauze soaked in Tylenol and clove oil...it was great!). So, we all waited at Gate B5 at SeaTac Airport waiting for his arrival from Atlanta. I sat down and was content. When people started getting off the plane his family kept saying, "aren't you going to greet him?" to which I replied, "I can greet him from here just as much as I can from up there." (can you tell I wasn't in the mood to share my greeting?)

There was a big group of people congregating around the exit talking with their families, and Eric must have been the very last person to get off the plane. He finally appeared and his little sister ran up to him and gave him a big hug. I Then walked up and gave him a hug and a kiss, then turned to leave. He grabbed my hand and when I turned around he was down on one knee. I was shocked. He pulled out a ring and asked me to marry him. I said yes and he put the ring on my finger. Then everyone started clapping. I guess everyone figured that a guy carrying flowers on a plane meant something special and decided to stick around to see what was going to happen.

A few minutes later I looked at the ring and was shocked because it was the one I had pointed out to one of our friends when we went browsing. She called Eric and told him he had to buy this specific ring, so he sent her a check to buy it, she mailed it to him in GA (which arrived the day before he left), and so he could propose as soon as he got off the plane.

We were married a month later in the Seattle Temple, and have shared the past 9 years together. We've had our trials, separations due to deployments and schools, and grown together into the amazing couple we are today.

Lonestar's song "Amazed" was very popular when we were dating....and I am truly amazed by my Sexy Beast's ability to make me smile, comfort me, and make my life whole. Happy Anniversary baby!

Visiting friends

2010-07-06T09:58:00.009-05:00

For the 4th of July we headed over to Kelly & Carolyn's house to celebrate mine, Eric's and Carolyn's birthdays (they all happen within a week of each other).

Carolyn did some awesome Army decorations for Eric, and I brought Hannah Montana themed everything for Carolyn. We all had a great time, had amazing food...and I'm not just saying that b/c I made awesome baked beans, layered jello, and the best pineapple upside down cake known to man :o) We watched a horrible movie, and talked and talked and talked.

Carter LOVED the fireworks, he squealed and smiled the entire time, but the noise kind of freaked Cooper out.

The next day we ~~invited ourselves over~~ accepted the invitation to visit my buddy from work, Molly. She lives out in the country and I don't ever get to work with her enough, so we did a lot of catching up. I was greeted at the door of my car by her "smiling" dog Zoe, who freaked me out at first, but she was wagging her tail and wasn't growling, so I figured I'd be safe.

I don't know about most of you, but I'm quite scared of most farm animals...especially the one's that are bigger than me. I've been bitten and chased by them throughout my childhood years, so you can imagine how surprised I was that all her animals were nice! Her mule, Rusty, literally followed us the entire time and nudged and bumped until he got the attention he deserved.

I got to hold some brand new baby chickens, play with her kitties, see the snake and tarantula (I get goose bumps just typing that word!), and her dogs. She remembered a conversation we had many moons ago at work, and made me a chocolate haupia pie garnished with homemade whipped cream! I was in heaven, and the boys took a great nap while I was there and were all around on their best behavior.

It was so nice to get out of the house and interact with adults!!

"Bitter Is the New Black" by Jen Lancaster

2010-07-03T09:48:00.004-05:00

I finished reading this book in February, but kept forgetting to post about it. It was a riot! It is labeled as "a memoir," and is descriptive enough that the reader can easily imagine each hilarious situation.

Disclaimer: this book does have profanity, which can easily be discovered by reading the front cover: "Bitter Is the New Black: Confessions of a condescending, egomaniacal, self-centered Smart-ass, or why you should never carry a Prada Bag to the unemployment office."

Jen was very successful during the 'dot-com' era, but soon finds herself, and her long term boyfriend, unemployed in NYC. They have to start parting with many things that they once considered necessities, and learning to live like the rest of the world.

My favorite part was when she decided to cancel her COBRA because she learned that her boyfriend's employer insured 'domestic partners' which she thought applied to her. After finding out it was referring to gay partners here is her plan:

"..What if you told them I was a guy? Couldn't you go to the benefits office and, you know, swish around a bit? Tell the HR girl that her shoes are fab-u-licious?...Ooh, you could give them my initials for the membership card, and they'll be none the wiser. J. Lancaster could totally be a dude. Correction, a gay dude."

"No."

"They wouldn't be allowed to pry into your private life...the plan is foolproof."

"Your plan is anything but foolproof. What happens when they get a bill from your ob-gyn?"...

Thinking on my feed, I quickly came up with plan B. "Ok, this could still work. You tell them I'm a post-op transsexual. I'll wear that really dark MAC lipstick that makes me look like a drag queen, and they will absolutely believe me."

"You've got to be kidding."

With great solemnity, I told him, "Castration is no joke."

"The answer is still no"

"No, you won't pretend to be gay, or no, you won't claim that I'm a tranny?"

"No to all the above."

She ends this great debate by calling him a "homophobe" and declaring "you suck donkey balls!" (pgs 129, 130)

If this made you laugh, or even smile, you'll get a kick out of this book.

I don't do giveaways, because I'm cheap, but I'd be happy to send it to you to borrow. Sending books media rate via USPS is less than $5, and is way cheaper than buying it (my mom, sisters and I love to send each other books we've enjoyed).

It's a pity party, and you're all invited!

2010-06-29T12:04:00.004-05:00

Ok, it started that way, but ended very nicely.

This Sunday I turned the big 28. I know, wow, 28...so much happens when you turn 28, like nothing.

I haven't been a huge fan of birthdays. This is because throughout my MANY years, so many of my birthdays have been quite disappointing. I've had two surprise parties that were pretty disastrous (one was thrown by some kids that didn't really know me and ignored me, so I walked home, and the other one, I was the first person to arrive). I've also had quite a few recently that included everyone backing out at the last minute, which left me feeling quite depressed.

So, this year I signed up to work on my birthday. I didn't really want to celebrate big because I didn't see a point. I told Eric the cake I wanted from Publix (which was fabulous), and that was it. I also ended up picking up a shift on Saturday so we celebrated Friday night with Eric making me dinner and eating cake. And, I probably got the best birthday present ever!! The entire series of Gilmore Girls on DVD. I LOVE that show!

I woke up at 0400 Sunday morning and called to work to see if I was needed, and they told me I was on call...so I went back to sleep. Then V called and she was moving that morning and I wanted to say goodbye and pick up some extra paint she had. So at about 0615 I started driving to V's, and just as I'm about to pull into her neighborhood work calls and says I have 30 minutes to clock in. I grab the paint from V and cried as I was saying goodbye to someone that has touched my life in such a monumental way that it is impossible to describe (I tear up now thinking about her so many miles away!).

But, I had a great day at work! There is a new graduate orienting to take my old full time position, and I LOVE working with new people! I also had many many emails throughout the day of people sending me birthday wishes on facebook. I was honestly shocked! AND, I got texts & voice mails from family sending (and singing) their birthday wishes. I had received quiet a few cards in the mail the week prior from Eric's family, and I'm really amazed.

But what shocked me the most was a card from a co-worker. She works nights, and gave it to me at shift change (as I was leaving). It was so thoughtful and heartfelt that I truly felt appreciated!

So, even though I was expecting to be disappointed, I was wrong. I just want to say that even though you are just typing two simple words to someone on FB or via text, it really makes a big difference. I really felt loved, THANK YOU!!

Who's the artist anyway?

2010-06-24T08:45:00.000-05:00

This semi-rant is inspired by the hilarious Cheeseboy, as my husband and I were following the resorts 'map' on some local trails. Eric and I went back and forth trying to figure out why we kept getting lost...and here's what we came up with:

Conversation between map illustrator and project manager

Ummm, Mark, I want to start out by saying that your drawing is great.

Thanks dude, I really put my heart and soul into it!

Yes, I can tell...but there is one major issue.

Is it too illustrious for the clientele?

No... it's just that the trails were supposed to be drawn to scale.

And?

Well, although you did a great job...it isn't quite accurate.

It's all about feng shui, dude.

I thought feng shui had to do with arranging furniture?

It's all about the feeling, dude!

[long pause]

Ok, but don't you think people will get lost on the trails if you have them connecting when they really don't?

I knew we would have creative differences, but who's the one with the degree?

Dude, you got it online.

Millions of people get degrees online!

Yes, but yours is from Barbados. Is it even credited in the US?

Dude, Barbados is the US?

Actually, it's not.

Well, you said the map is everything you ever wanted, right?

No.

But doesn't it make you feel one with the Earth just looking at it?

No.

Don't you have a dead line?

Yes.

Okay then, me and your sister will see you Friday night for dinner.

--------------------------------------------------

I recently won an iTunes gift card from the amazing Jessica G. for the Swagger Wagon video that I submitted to make her smile.

This is perfect b/c I'm in desperate need of updating my Gym Jams with some current music that will help keep me motivated to keep walking/jogging in this 95 degree heat here in FL. So, what is that one song on your playlist that always makes you run or push a little harder when you hear it?? I LOVE a good beat, and for quite awhile that song for me has been S.O.S. by Rihanna...not sure why, but it always makes me step up my game when it comes on. What song makes you keep moving??

My week "off"

2010-06-22T12:16:00.005-05:00

Last week was Eric's last week of leave, so I signed up to work 4 shifts. I knew that by signing up for 4 shifts, I would probably at least get to work 3 of them...and I did. I was able to work one shift in Peds, while the other two were spent on the Medical-Surgical and Post-Surgical floors. It was nice to work, but it was SO exhausting. When I was working that kind of schedule every week it wasn't too bad, but when I'm only used to working once a week, working that much really kicked my butt.

Eric, on the other hand, had high aspirations of cleaning out the garage, cutting the lawn, and many other household tasks that desperately need to be completed. He soon discovered that the boys take up quite a bit of time. Instead of me sitting on the floor with the boys when he got home, I would get home in the morning with one baby in the swing, and the other sleeping next to him on the couch. He hasn't given up hope of becoming a stay at home dad when he retires, but I told him the only way that would be fair was if I had a baby right before he retires, otherwise the boys will be in school all day!

We both managed pretty well, and I look forward to my paycheck since the boys are fast out growing the pack n play they are currently sleeping in. We're going to try only buying one crib for now, and sleeping the other one in the pack n play...but since they have always slept together, we'll have to play it by ear!

Here are some cute pictures of the boys! Cooper has turned into such a little smiley guy too!! And I think they know that I can't get frustrated when they are smiling...like when they only take 2 oz during the feeding, so they start smiling and cooing while spitting the bottle out. They have such different little personalities already!

I rested Carter in the Boppy after his feeding, and started washing bottles...when I came back this is how I found him, he had somehow slid himself over top of the boppy. He's going to be the one I'll be chasing soon!

Another classic Eric posing

This is my new favorite picture of them!

Cooper flexing his muscles

What a week!

2010-06-13T21:22:00.005-05:00

We all had a great adventure in Tennessee, even with a few days of rain. The boys did pretty good until the last 30 minutes of the drive (going and coming back). We have learned that a 7.5 hr trip really takes about 9.5 hrs :o)

One of the days we made the 2 hr trip to Gatlinburg where we hit up Ripley's Aquarium (which all of the signs boasted to be "America's favorite"...which I doubt). I was a little taken back at the price for adults ($22), but were delightfully surprised when our military discount got 2 tickets for a total of $9! It was a lot of fun, as you can tell.
We did another 2 hr drive East to visit some friends at Ft. Campbell and Nashville, and talked, ate, and relaxed. The rest of the trip was spent chillin in our room and spending quality time with the boys. It was very relaxing and we all had a good time.

Here are some random pix of the boys, who are now 3 months (Carter in blue, Cooper in yellow)!!

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And, for your viewing pleasure...some videos of the boys, because I know my mom isn't the only one that wants to see my beautiful boys. And...because I know you'll ask...these were all things that I caught Eric doing and laughed hysterically, so I grabbed the camera :o)

Quick update

2010-06-07T21:16:00.002-05:00

For all my dedicated readers...all three of you...okay, just Mom...I'm on vacation in Tennessee, aka the middle of nowhere. The boys tolerated the trip without too many freak outs, and when we pulled over to change the boys on the trunk of the car (b/c it seems like no one has changing tables in bathrooms anymore) I was in the drivers seat when I look out my window and see Eric holding Carter's face up against my window yelling, "window licker, window licker!" You remember that weird kid on the school bus that would always push his face on the window and sometimes sneak a lick? I guess Eric is just reliving some of his most memorable childhood moments :o)

I catch up on blogs next week, and hopefully have some cute pictures to share too...of the boys, not me!

My 'Dead to Me' list is growing...

2010-06-03T10:10:00.003-05:00

To paraphrase one of my favorite characters from 30 Rock, Liz Lemon...there ain't no party like an Army party, cuz an Army party is MANDATORY.

I really do love Military Balls (stop snickering!). It is a great excuse to get all dolled up and socialize with a lot of ladies that I don't get to see very often. Last year I boycotted the Ball. Normally, if you don't plan on attending the powers that be will put you on a detail to set up/tear down for the event. We had planned on attending until they told Eric that he would have to set up and tear down. This would mean he would have to show up 3 hours ahead of time and we would have to take separate vehicles, and the location was 45 minutes away. Plus, have you ever tried to drive in a ball gown?? So, when his old commander asked why he was flying stag, he told him exactly why.

When people asked me if I was going to attend this year, I simply replied that it all depends on whether I have a dress that I can wear. And, I don't. I have one that I could get taken in, but alterations on Ball gowns have run upward of $75 in the past. And, even though they are providing daycare, I really don't want the boys with so many other kids when they are still so young...and finding someone that is able to watch both kids on a Friday night has proven futile.

So, the plan was for Eric to buy a ticket, and just not go. That way he wouldn't be put on a detail. Well, they made the Ball mandatory. So, Military Balls are now dead to me. I know that there will be many more in the future since Eric is in 'for life,' but I don't have to like it!

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Next is companies that buy, sell, or rent timeshares. We own timeshares with Wyndham, and because Eric always puts my cell down as the home number, I get at least one call a day about our timeshare. It wouldn't be as bad but they always hang up. Can you imagine getting hang ups EVERYDAY! So, because of this harassment I pay $2.00 a month to T-Mobile for Family Allowances because that is the only way I can block numbers to my phone. And when I tried calling back the latest number it goes to a voicemail box that is full, so I sent a text message yesterday saying, 'stop calling me and hanging up, this is bordering harassment!' They still called again today. I think the next time one of these companies calls me I'm going to ask when they plan on mailing me a check for the money I've spent blocking their calls. Yeah, I'm just plain frustrated!

The thrill is gone

2010-06-01T02:36:00.000-05:00

Dear Bangs,

Let's face it, we had a good run. We tried to make it work for 10 weeks and this isn't our first go around either, remember elementary, middle school, and 9th grade?? I think I put in more than enough effort, but the end result is lacking. So, I bid ado because I'm sick of pinning you down, straightening, curling, and brushing you aside. Let's end this on a good note and not place blame...because after all, Eric is the one that suggested we team up again.

Sincerely,
Mary

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I now know why it is so important to change out of you pajamas each day. It is vital to my survival to get my shower, blow dry my hair, and put on something that isn't covered in spit up. It is my time to feel pretty, even if it only happens once the boys have gone down for the night, and I sacrifice sleep to do it. I've experienced both sides of the weight spectrum, and there are two things that make you feel pretty matter what the label of your jeans says...hair and shoes.

I used to always have long hair, but when I lost weight a few years ago I decided that my face was no longer too fat to have short hair. I really love my current length, and going the extra mile every once in awhile to straighten & curl my hair has always brightened up my day.

Eric constantly teases me about how many shoes I own, but I point out that I only buy about 3 pairs a year, which is the same amount he buys. Is it really my fault that my shoes last longer?? I have shoes that are over 10 years old (gotta love Dr. Martens!) and they are still wearable with current fashions (if you don't think so, don't tell me b/c they work for me!). And, now that all the swelling is gone in my feet, and my skin has tightened up I was able to put my toe rings back on yesterday! I got them when I lived in HI, and they are fitted, and I'm glad I had the insight to take them off before the swelling started.

So, if you're feeling down, go get your hair done or buy a cute pair of shoes...because you're worth it!

Happy Memorial Day

2010-05-31T14:33:00.003-05:00

All gave some...and some gave all. Remember those who paid the ultimate sacrifice.

"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13 KJV

Getting better everyday...

2010-05-29T09:58:00.004-05:00

The boys and I are starting to get into a nice routine. I put them down at night between 7-9, and they wake up for another feeding between 12-2, then wake up for the day between 6-8. In the beginning I spent most of the day staring at the clock and waiting for Eric to get home. Now, both the boys have started smiling and the PT I'm doing at home with Cooper seems to be helping with his head lag.
The boys LOVE the mobile in their pack-n-play and it always produces quite a few smiles and coos. I find myself smiling much more now because I'm sleeping a lot better, and you can't help but smile, no matter how frustrated you are, when the boys are sporting a huge open-mouthed smile.
Eric left Thursday morning to meet up with the guys he plays Call of Duty & Battlefield Bad Company with on the computer...aka...geek convention. It was initially scheduled to be held in Nashville, and the boys and I were going to go with, but the resort we had booked got flooded, and they ended up moving the event to Ohio. So, so far so good. The boys are still alive, and I'm not too sleep deprived. It has been a good test run for when Eric will be gone for OCS (26 Sept-16Dec).

I've also found a great website, thanks to Molly, coupons.com and saved $24 on my last purchase of diapers and wipes. Every little bit helps!

Work has been great, even when I'm not in my unit. There really are a great bunch of nurses at my hospital! And I've learned that without a nap, a 12hr shift is possible, even without any sleep when I get home...it's call RockStar Juiced :o) I'm so blessed that I am physically able to work, and that I work at a place that allows me to pick up shifts that are convenient for me (i.e. when Eric will be home to watch the boys).

**Clihk here to view my photos of the boys on Facebook**

Happy Mother's Day, Birthday, & Anniversary!

2010-05-27T09:00:00.003-05:00

If you know me at all, you know I LOVE personalized items. So, it is no wonder that I fell in love with Gina Alexander handbags quite a few years ago when I was up late and saw them showcased on HSN (which I don't think I've watched since!) The pictures are printed directly onto the fabric, and they use real leather.

I knew I wanted one, but because I'm quite frugal I signed up for their emails and waited for a sale that was just up my alley. My first purchase was about 3 years ago when I chose the Julia bag with a picture of my puppies.

I ordered the bag in time for the Christmas deadline, but due to the abundance of orders they called me to let me know it wouldn't make it in time, so they were sending me a gift certificate for a free cosmetic bag. I was thrilled!! Well, about 6 months later one of the grommets that held the strap together started to get loose. I emailed the company and asked if they could send me a new grommet, but instead they had me ship the bag back, and they replaced both grommets and I had my purse back within 3 weeks (to include shipping time).

My next purchase came 2 days after Tyler died. I was still very upset and wanted to have something to carry with me that reminded me of him, so I bought one of their key chains. It makes me smile everytime I look at it, and it's a great price!

Now, for the latest purchase. I couldn't have a purse with my dogs on it, and not have one with my children!! So, I used my favorite picture from my shoot with V and purchased the My Everything bag.

It turned out so great, and I know I'll get just as many compliments about it as I have every other item I've purchased. On both bags I've chosen to get the "underglass" option, which is a thick plastic covering that protects the fabric underneath from water/stains. I love these bags, and wanted to share!!

Note to self...

2010-05-22T12:27:00.001-05:00

Letting it all hang out

2010-05-20T22:42:00.003-05:00

I just want to preface this post by stating that what I'm about to say has nothing to do with one individual person, conversation, or action.

I'm feeling lost...abandoned...and like a failure.

Is my previous identity as an amazingly talented (using the term loosely) woman gone? I'm I now only to be seen as a mother of twins? The transition of being a couple to parents is challenging. I don't mind giving up many things, and I knew what I was getting into, but that being said, you never know how you will feel until it happens. Some people may have seen me as being selfish, by waiting to have kids for 8 years, but so what! I wanted to be in the right state of mind, and be ready to give up my independance before I made the giant leap into parenthood. And, I can honestly say I'm glad I had those years alone with my husband. We are best friends and he is someone I confide in with EVERYTHING. He is my rock!

I really miss my friends. I know many have kept their distance because they didn't want to interrupt me, knowing I have my hands full, but it is getting kind of lonely. I haven't seen many people since before I went on bedrest in January. I get tired of being the one to always call, always set things up. I guess that's just more of me being selfish...maybe even a little self-centered.

I hate being the fat girl again, which has really hit me the hardest. I know, I know, I JUST HAD TWINS...but it doesn't make me feel any better. I worked so hard, for so long to be healthy that I feel like a failure to look like this again. I'm walking as often as I can, but my pelvis/hips are still quite painful that I can't do more than about 2-3 miles at a time. Eric tried to point out how everyone says how good I look for just having twins...but seriously, who is gonna walk up and say "geez, you might want to hide that muffin top!" (okay, maybe my friend Amber...but I love her for her honesty!)

With all the craziness I just hadn't had much time to sit down with Eric and talk, which is what we did tonight...and I feel so much better. Sometimes, you just have to let it all hang out :o)

*comments off*

BIG NEWS!!!

2010-05-13T17:26:00.003-05:00

I know it's completely taboo to post twice in one day, but I have something exciting to share!!!

ERIC IS OFFICIALLY ACCEPTED TO OCS!!! (Officer Candidate School)

They have changed things up a bit, and he won't have a branch beforehand, instead he will be competing with everyone else, based on grades & PT scores, for his pick.

We don't have a date of when he'll be going, but the first three months will be at Ft. Benning, GA (only 4 hrs away) then he'll come home before he goes to his next training.

I'll share more when we find out more...right now we are celebrating!!

Knock on wood!

2010-05-13T08:56:00.006-05:00

I don't want to jinx anything....but the boys went 8 1/2 hrs between feedings last night! My sanity is beginning to be restored, hallelujah!
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Last week Carter took a trip to the ER since they had no available appointments on base, and he had blood in his stool. The docs think it's an allergy to the milk-based formula...which was weird to me that it would present after 7 weeks of use. So, now both boys are on Nutramigen (the expensive stuff), but they are sleeping better which is worth it.

I had a wonderful Mother's Day! The best gift came as we sat down for church and Sister Grey came over to say hi...and Cooper smiled! This is huge because this is the first time he has smiled while being awake. Carter is super smiley all the time, but up until almost 8 weeks all Cooper did while he was awake was cry (which has improved dramatically this week).

Cooper

Carter

The boys are now at the 50% at 2 months, and Carter is catching up to Cooper fast!

Carter is 11lbs 7oz, and Cooper is 12lbs 3oz
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We have been taking family walks around the newly paved park by my house when Eric gets off work. He will normally run a mile or two with Koa, to get some of his energy out b/c he LOVES to run, and then they will catch up with me walking while I finish. Yesterday was no different except Eric was especially sweaty so he decided to walk home instead of getting my cloth seats dirty (we live about 1/3 mile away from the park). When I got home Koa reluctantly got out of the car and about 5 feet from the front door he collapsed and started seizing. I grabbed him ran inside, screamed for Desiree to get the boys out of the car (Thanks Dez!), grabbed his Valium syringe and administered it (in the tooter), picked him back up and got in the car and headed to the vet.

He had a temperature over 105, and a "high" temp for a dog is 101-103, and by the time they got him to the back he was starting to have another seizure. They gave him cold IV fluids, and laid him on ice packs. They know me really well at this vet because of when Tyler died, so they let me come to the back after about 5 minutes and Koa already looked better and held still once I picked him up. I just cried b/c I felt like such a moron. It was 4pm and the temp was only 83 degrees, which he has ran in numerous times before. We offered him water at the water fountain every lap, but he only drank once...and he was pulling the entire time. They sent us home with is IV access so I could give him the Valium faster if he had another seizure, but all was quiet and we took it out this morning.

So, I'm retarded and gave my dog heat stroke. But, they did say I was smart to bring him in right away b/c he would have died otherwise.

So, lesson learned.

Getting back in the saddle sure is a pain in the butt!

2010-05-03T12:38:00.003-05:00

After a very short 7 weeks, I headed back to work on Sunday. Even though I am scheduled in Pediatrics, there weren't enough kids for 2 nurses so I was out on the Medical-Surgical floor. They were nice enough to take into consideration that I hadn't worked in almost 6 months, so I only had 4 patients...but that was more than enough. I was working with a great bunch of people that took the time to answer my silly questions and give me a hand whenever I needed it. My legs were shot by the end of the day and I definitely prefer night shift more than days, but I survived.

I came home exhausted after 12+ hrs on the floor, and as soon as I walked in the door Eric says, "don't hate me, but the boys slept all day." I just groaned because I knew they would be up all night...and they were.

The next day wasn't too bad and work called at about noon to see if I could possibly work in Peds that night because the nurse scheduled had called in sick (the unit had been closed, but if someone was admitted I would have to work). I called Eric and he agreed that I could work and I went about my day.

At about 2pm I started having bad stomach pains, which by 4pm turning into puking. I called work and apologized, but there was no way I could work. I had to run and wake Desiree up to watch the boys until Eric got home because whatever I had caught, I didn't want the boys to get sick.

I HATE getting sick, especially puking!! Things quieted down by about 5am but I couldn't sleep because my entire body hurt. My back was the worst, I couldn't get into a comfortable position and finally when I was no longer nauseated I took some Tylenol...but it didn't seem to help much. I started feeling better at about 5pm, so I came out of quarantine and got to see my boys.

It is amazing how much I missed holding them. Normally I'm frustrated because they both want to be held at the same time, but not holding them for 24 hrs just about drove me crazy!

So far there are no signs of anyone else in the house getting sick, so keep your fingers crossed. One of my friends said her kids were sick this weekend, and a friend that was working at the hospital on Sunday with me, in a different unit, was puking too...so there is definitely something going around!

Let's just pray that I won't catch anything else on my next shift!

W.A.S.T.S.

2010-04-27T23:10:00.004-05:00

I've decided to form a group, W.A.S.T.S., which stands for Women Against See-Through Shirts. This epidemic must be stopped!

I remember in High School, only 10 short years ago, it was a total scandal when a girl wore a black see-through top with a black bra. People were gossiping the entire day about it and some people even made comments about the type of girl she must be.

Now it seems that all white, and light-colored shirts are paper thin and you are expected to wear any color bra besides white or beige.

Since when did the bra become the most appealing accessory?? I know that most actresses and singers like to show not only their bra, but sometimes their lack of underwear, but since when were they ever really considered role models? And, while watching What Not To Wear on TLC, I know that the hosts would agree with me...it's just tacky.

So, I'm calling all ladies to make a pledge to keep your bra (and underwear...but that's a whole other post) PRIVATE. Spread the word and help me raise awareness!

Where is the Love?

2010-04-24T17:53:00.004-05:00

I think Koa has been feeling left out lately. When we first brought the boys home he took every chance he could to get in between us and the boys, but now he has began to accept them. He still insists on sitting on my lap whenever it is vacant, but he has began to do his part in caring for the boys.

keeping their boppys warm while they are being held.

making sure Carter is warm.

cleaning Cooper's face after a feeding.

He really has adjusted well, and I hope that eventually the boys will learn to love him as much as we do.

The curious case of Carter Salmond

2010-04-22T13:25:00.004-05:00

You know how baby boys either look like the Gerber baby or like little old men?? I have one of each. Cooper's chubby cheeks scream 'I should be on the label of baby food,' while Carter is very slender and looks wise beyond his years.

As seen in the picture above, Carter was born with a full head of hair...until EXACTLY 4 weeks. That morning, I got both boys ready for their Dr. appt and we headed out. I stripped the boys down to their diapers, as required by military pediatricians, and noticed that Carter looked like he had a receding hairline...but I laughed it off and kept on with my day.

Later that night I made the comment to Eric about his hair line, and neither of us was very concerned. Then, the next morning...he was completely bald on top! I'm talking spit shined, catching the glare from the lights bald!

I racked my brain and was convinced that maybe I had scrubbed his head to hard when bathing him, but Cooper's hair was fine. I was also worried that he would follow the Arnold trend of being almost completely bald on top by age 25, but 1 month was a serious leap.

I'm happy to report that some peach fuzz has broken the surface today, and I promise to no longer make jokes about him being bald, or rubbing his head like a lamp and making wishes. But I will, however, make him sport some cute hats until his rug has comes in completely :o)

Unpaid Internship available, apply within

2010-04-17T05:19:00.004-05:00

Wanted:
2nd pair of arms

Qualifications:
Female (lesbians welcome, and even encouraged)
Experience with children preferred (but you won't be left on your own for quite some time b/c you could be a serial killer for all I know!)
Must have usable arms (as the boys are growing at an exponential rate)

Job Description:
Hold screaming babies
Feed screaming babies
Change diapers of screaming babies
Snuggle happy babies (when they are sleeping)

Benefits:
Being around me (and soaking up my awesomeness)
Room & Board (i.e. my couch, and scavenging for food b/c I don't cook)
Savings plan (since this experience is the best birth control on the market, you can save all that money to buy cute shoes and sushi)
Weight Loss Program (if there is no time to sleep, there is definitely no time to eat)
...did I mention being around me??

**Although there is no college credit offered, as of right now, the experiences that you encounter will aid in shaping you into either an amazing person that can deal with anything...or having a mental breakdown which inevitably will land you in a psych facility wearing a straight jacket while rocking back and forth in the fetal position talking about "the pretty birds."**

An ode to my peeps

2010-04-16T04:02:00.003-05:00

Here is the birth announcement for the boys, for all of you that won't be getting one in the mail, and for those special folks that can't pull up Facebook at work (like Molly, the maker of the adorable blankets).

I purchased thses from Simply to Impress, and I have to say that I am impressed with the outcome!

Hello and Goodbye

2010-04-14T18:15:00.000-05:00

With the new addition of my boys, it was only a matter of time before I had to accept that things were changing, and I must welcome and bid farewell to many things in my life.

Hello Motherhood! Holy crap, I'm responsible for 2 tiny people...and myself!

Hello to "mommy belly" and all the saggy scarred skin that graces my mid-section. I know I've never had a model quality figure, but by welcoming this I can also begin to welcome in my "body I deserve" savings account to eventually put back everything where it belongs.

Hello again, caffeine! I hope you don't hold our 9 month absence against me...oh how I've missed you :o) And, I discovered a new RockStar drink that might be my new favorite, uncarbonated Lemonade (only 20 calories a can)!

Goodbye silence, because as soon as one of the boys is content he sends a sibliminal message to the other causing him to scream.

Goodbye sleep. We used to be good friends, before Nursing School and this pregnancy, but I'm sure we'll meet again soon...possibly in about 18 yrs.

Goodbye food...not because I don't seem to have time to eat, but because Koa has become a chow thief and so far has eaten over half of a bowl of spaghetti & a waffle as soon as I left the area. I told Eric to have a talk with Koa about what they do to chow theives in Ranger School, but I don't think he got the message.

Goodbye sanity, which was more than apparent when I referred to the boys as "Cooter" and "Carper."

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My adorable birth announcements arrived today!! So, all my family and friends that read, and don't comment, send me your addresses to: way2cool2bcocky (at) gmail (dot) com, so you can increase the beauty of your refrigerators with the cuteness of my boys. (that was almost too sicky sweet to type, let alone read)

My Sunday Blessings

2010-04-11T13:48:00.006-05:00

I'm totally stealing this concept from fellow blogger & Army wife, Jeannie. I have a lot to be grateful for, and I wanted to give some shout outs!

First, and most important, I want to thank the savior of my sanity, Eric. He has been such a trooper and as soon as he gets home from work, he takes over caring for the boys and lets me get a much needed nap. I told him yesterday that I was overwhelmingly grateful for all his help, to which he replied, "they're my kids too!" And, since he had today off, he let me sleep "for as long as you need to," last night...and it was MUCH needed. Also, Desiree has given me quite a few 2hr breaks when she gets home from work in the morning...and has repeatedly said that Mothers deserve more than just one day a year :o)

Next, my awesome family. They rallied together to provide many of the large ticket items that I needed for the boys, and have been a continued provider of moral support. And right after I posted about my battle with the snaps, my mom found the gowns that everyone was mentioning and had them overnight shipped to me...and my sisters went out and found some long-sleeved onesies with the flap to keep the babies from scratching themselves, and as seen in the picture below, what Eric likes to call 'baby straight jackets,' but I like to think of them as cute cardigans (but they are great for the short sleeved onesies I already have!)
I can't forget to mention Eric's relatives in Utah. They surprised me the week before the boys arrived with a baby shower via Skype. I was so impressed, and as you can see from the pictures below, they had a lot of fun too!

And, my friends...local, faraway, and online. Thanks for the words of encouragement, advice, and laughs.

Last, but not least, I'm thankful for my sweet boys...even when I'm exhausted and in dire need of sleep.

New Pictures!

2010-04-08T17:11:00.003-05:00

Vanessa just finished taking some pictures of the boys b/c I desperately want to get out birth announcements soon. I just uploaded my favorites on Facebook, so if you are already a friend (which means your awesome) check them out...if you aren't on Facebook go to this link click here.

Does anyone have a company/website they have used for announcements that they really liked?? I need suggestions!!

Good things come to those who procrastinate

2010-04-05T13:47:00.005-05:00

Most people would probably describe Eric and I as indecisive, but I think at least part of the time it can be chalked up to good 'ole procrastination. There is always the exception to the rule, like Eric when he sees some ridiculous electronic on sale or when I'm online shopping at 2 in the morning and my conscious is fast asleep. Although procrastination normally maintains a negative stigma, today it finally paid off.

Remember my poor Corolla that died in January? It has been sitting and collecting leaves in my front yard since. Most people would never consider parking their dead vehicle in their yard, but most people don't live in the ghetto. We've been trying to find a junk yard to take the car, but there is only one in town, and they only get vehicles from auctions...and I've been a little busy with the boys to have the motivation to continue trying. I'm normally unable to see the benefits of our location, but today I'm proud of our little house on crack alley!

I was feeding the boys at about noon when someone rang the doorbell, and I answered in true white trash fashion, still in my PJ's and holding Carter with a bottle in his mouth. Koa ran out the door and scared the guy half to death, but I ushered him back inside and he quieted down. The guy asked if the Corolla was for sale b/c he noticed all the leaves that had accumulated. I told him about the engine compression issues AND the fact that I had just replaced the shocks, struts, and tires a year ago. He asked how much I wanted for it, and I asked what he wanted to pay. He said, "so junk price, $100?" I was thrilled and told him that was fine but I had to find out when Eric was getting home so he could sign the title over. The guy said he wasn't concerned about the title and pulled out his wallet and tried handing me 2 $50's b/c he wanted to take the car right now. I explained that I had two newborns inside and was unable to take everything out of the car at this moment...to which he said he could help me...but I wasn't about to let a stranger in my house. So, I told him to hang on to his money and I would call him once Eric got home and he could come get the car, but he insisted on giving me the $100 and said he'd come back later to tow it off.

How awesome is that?!? Think of the diapers and formula that will buy! (it's amazing how my aspiring purchases have drastically changed)

Even though I live in the ghetto, and subsequently have a 6' board on board privacy fence and alarm system...the plus is you have your neighbors, and in this case their friends, shopping in your front yard :o)

Happy Easter, Happy Birthday, and in memory...

2010-04-04T16:22:00.005-05:00

What an amazing day. Spring has finally shown it's beautiful face just in time to celebrate the Easter. I hope everyone enjoys this amazing day however you choose to celebrate it.

I want to wish a very Happy Birthday to my big brother Mike (the big 31). We've always been pretty close, and his wife can attest that we still share some of the same gestures, sayings, and things that probably drive her crazy.

And last, but not least, I want to remember John D. Amos who was killed 6 yrs ago today in Kirkuk, Iraq. You are never forgotten. (this is the person Carter's middle name came from).

A life long addiction

2010-04-02T05:12:00.002-05:00

I feel a personal obligation to help blow the lid off of something that has been kept quiet for far too long...milk-aholicism.

I've seen this first hand with my boys. They will cry, scream, and make your life miserable unless you enable their habit. And once the sweet nectar touches their lips that are consumed with a high that I'm sure is as strong as cocaine. Then, they become so intoxicated that their bodies go limp and they appear to be in a coma-like state...until the high is gone, and the cycle starts all over again.

I would like to thank eTrade for their brave new campaign that helps call attention to this worldwide issue.

You've all been warned...

The snaps made me snap!

2010-03-31T05:33:00.004-05:00

I've worked in day cares and nannied through High School, but I swear I don't remember all those crazy snaps on onesies/sleepers! I'm guessing it's more apparent to me know because I feel like my whole day is consumed by un-snapping and snapping onesies in between the million diaper changes for the boys. What ever happened to zippers? They are so much faster, but I guess people worry about getting skin caught in them...but they are so much faster.

I think I hit my breaking point Monday. It was my first day alone with the boys and they did their best in not allowing me to get more than 30 minutes of sleep during the day. I was about to cry when Eric called and said he didn't have to go to GA and would be coming home instead!!! I was elated, and he helped me out that evening. But, something was said that really embarrassed me and the water works started flowing....and kept flowing...and flowing all night long. The boys continued their marathon in true tag team fashion. As soon as one would fall asleep, the other one would wake up. Eric awoke the next morning to me still in tears and said he would try his hardest to get off as early as possible.

Finally, after being awake for about 30 hours, I was able to catch two 30 min naps. Then Eric got home at 1400 and told me to sleep for as long as I needed. He also continued to help once I woke up and even woke up to see if I needed help this morning at 0330 since both boys were crying. I also took Desiree up on her offer to help, so I got a much needed 4 hrs last night. It truly is amazing what sleep can do for your psyche, and we're all looking forward to Eric's 4 day weekend!

Newton's Law of Motion states...

2010-03-28T07:27:00.008-05:00

...for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This has become very evident over the past 2 weeks.

The boys only seem to fill their diapers once they start sucking on the bottle. Also, with all the stretching my tummy went through to carry over 13 lbs of babies, it only makes sense it would shrink back down (and if it doesn't, there's always plastic surgery!). That 30 lbs I gained my last two weeks of pregnancy was sure to be the death of me, but I'm happy to report that I'm already 60 lbs lighter. But most importantly, all the pain and discomfort that I experienced with this pregnancy, and labor, it only makes sense that I would be rewarded with beautiful, healthy boys. That Newton was one smart guy!

The past two weeks have been a whirlwind, but I have been lucky that my lil sis, Sarah, was able to take a week break from school and help me out. She has been a life saver!! She sees something that needs to be done, and does it without having to be asked, and most importantly, she has been helping me out at night with feedings so I can get some sleep. Sadly, I have to drop her off at the airport tomorrow morning, and she will be missed...not just for the help, but b/c she is such an amazing person!

Carter started smiling last week, which is the cutest thing in the world...but he only smiles for me when he is falling asleep, and he smiles for Eric all the time when he is awake. I call FOUL!!! How is that fair? He is also quite the snuggle monkey and has decided that he doesn't like to sleep in the pack n play (which we think is b/c when they were in the NICU, they were always at an incline, so we have a small, vibrating papoose-like chair that he has taken a fondness to). I was so impressed with Carter's latching, but soon disappointed (as he was) that he wouldn't suck hard enough to get what he needed. So pumping takes up most of my "free" time in between feedings.

Cooper has had a rough week. He wants absolutely NOTHING to do with the boob, and even with taking breast milk in the bottle, he was crazy fussy and had horrible gas no matter how long we spent burping him. When he did sleep, he was very restless so we had a sample can of the fussy formula, and I'm definitely a believer! It has made a huge difference.

Both the neonatologist & pediatrician told me not to bring the boys in public, and they even specifically said Church, until they are at least 8 weeks old. I understand why (especially since they already had an infection at birth) but I was a little bummed...until I realized I will get to debut my boys on Mother's Day! And, the boys should be big enough by then to pimp their pin striped suits that Auntie Cathy & Sarah got for them!

It's getting that time again (feeding time), so here are some recent pix!

Carter getting ready to leave the NICU

Cooper 1 week

Carter 1 week

Eric watching the boys, while playing Battlefield Bad Company 2 (Cooper is in the sling, and Carter is in the chair)

Koa trying to get attention while I was feeding Cooper

Carter (left) & Cooper (right)

Eric & the boys

My new cut & color!

The details (WARNING: very long post)

2010-03-15T16:05:00.005-05:00

Last Monday I was evaluated for preeclampsia at my scheduled doctor's visit, and was released to do a 24 hr urine collection for a better indicator of the condition. Tuesday afternoon we received a phone call from the doc saying that I did have preeclampsia and I needed to come to the hospital tonight to be admitted, and to deliver the following day.

Eric and I made our way to the hospital and although we were both tired, neither one of us slept that night...probably out of anticipation. The next morning (Wednesday) they started me on Pitocin, broke the presenting twin's water, and I got an epidural at about 0900. I know some people are very into the whole "natural" childbirth thing, but I had been in so much pain with this pregnancy already (and it was high risk trying a vaginal delivery anyway) that I was all about my epidural!

I progressed VERY slowly throughout the day, and had to get my epidural increased at 1400 b/c the pain was getting to be a little too much. At 2030 I was still only 7cm dilated and the pain was increasing significantly, so they called for another adjustment to the epidural. When I was getting a bolus I told the doc that it felt like it wasn't in place, and I could feel fluid dripping down my back. At that point I had complete movement and feeling in my legs, so they took out the first one, and put in another. But it took an hour for this to happen, and during that time they had to turn off the pitocin b/c my contractions were only 45 seconds apart and so painful that I was crying without realizing it, and was having an impossible time catching my breath between them.

So, at 0000 (Thursday) the doc checks me and I'm still only 7cm and is worried b/c my contractions were never very consistent, and we were approaching the 18hr mark since my water had been broken. Eric and I talked about it, and we wanted to try for one more hour b/c I really didn't want a C-section. The doc agreed, but in the meantime he called in the OR team, and had me sign all the consents that would be needed.

At 0100 I had become more swollen, and still had not progressed so into the OR we went. The Nurse Anesthetist that placed the 2nd epidural said that since it was working, he wanted to stick with that instead of placing a spinal also. I was weary, and asked him if it would work as well, and he said yes.

I have battled with nausea the entire pregnancy, and this day was no different, so as they strapped me down I had to turn my head to the side and try to focus on not throwing up. The nurse anesthetist verified I was numb, and I told him that it wasn't as effective on the left, but if was still above where they would be working, so they proceeded.

I felt a lot of pulling and tugging, and was thrilled when I heard the first baby cry, and then the second. I couldn't believe I was actually a mommy! And then...I started to feel pain on the left. I told the nurse about it, and he said, "you'll feel some pressure and tugging," to which I responded, "I feel PAIN!"

My epidural was not cutting it...and I felt them sewing up my uterus, muscles, underlying tissues, and the skin. They shot me up with everything they could, but nothing was helping.

When I got into the recovery room I was in more pain than I could have imagined, so they gave me 4mg of morphine and I was pretty out of it. I remember hearing Cooper grunting, and asking Eric to hand him to me...then the nurses came in and took him back to the nursery b/c it wasn't resolving. Carter was smacking and sucking and then the doc came in and said that they did a chest xray, and Cooper had a small pneumothorax (hole in his lung that was increasing the pressure in his chest, making it hard for him to breathe), and his blood showed signs of infection.

We all thought that Cooper (the bigger of the two) was the presenting twin, but it was Carter. So they called the local neonatalogist and he wanted both babies to be transferred to their hospital's NICU. I never freaked out (not sure if it was the drugs, or that I knew they were being proactive), nor did Eric. The neonatalogist, along with a team of 3 nurses, came with EMS and I was able to see both the boys for about a minute before they were transferred.

The rest of the day was spent with people waking me up every 5 minutes, and a complete lack of communication caused me to get very frustrated with the nurses and doctors. One nurse told me I could only have ice chips, then a doctor walks in and asks why I won't drink anything....then I asked when I could get out of bed (b/c I know the sooner you get up and moving, the sooner they will discharge you) and I was told not yet...I tell them I'm hungry (b/c one of the nurses refused my lunch b/c I hadn't drank the fluids from breakfast) and another nurse comes in and says the doc says "you have to get out of bed if you want dinner!" I was about in tears b/c everyone was telling me something different to do, or not to do...and no one was communicating! So, by the time the night shift took over, the nurse actually asked me what was going on (b/c the docs were freaked out b/c I wasn't outputting any urine) and she realized I was trying to comply with everyone's commands. So, she got me out of bed and walked with me around the unit...I started outputting urine, and before midnight she took out the foley and disconnected me from all the fluids.

So Friday morning the doc says I clear to go, b/c he knew I was dying to go see the boys. I had sent Eric home that night to get a good night's sleep b/c I knew he was exhausted, and I knew I would need a lot of help b/c the swelling in my legs had made it VERY hard to move around. I took a shower at the hospital, and we headed over to see the boys.

It was almost unreal for me b/c they were both sleeping and I wasn't going to wake them up, but over the next few days at least one of them was awake and I've been able to do multiple feedings, while I let Eric change all the diapers (I figure I'll be doing enough of that at home, and he doesn't' mind).

Cooper's pneumo cleared up within 2 days, and both boys have been getting antibiotics which is why they are still in the NICU. They should be coming home Thursday after their last dose, and we are excited to bring home our beautiful boys.

Okay, if I forgot something or the details seem a little garbled, sorry. It was a whirlwind of events over the past few days. I'm healing, slowly, and in quite a bit of pain...but today was a day of rejoicing b/c some of the swelling is starting to go down in my legs, and I hope sometime soon I can start wearing shoes again!

I want to thank everyone for their support and prayers, we are so blessed to have our boys here without any life-threatening complications.

And here are some recent photos of the boys.

Cooper

Carter

Twin Boys Born on 11 March 2010

2010-03-12T23:09:00.010-06:00

Carter "Lil' Man" Amos Salmond

18.5 in. / 5 lbs. 14 oz.

Cooper "Hoss" Aedan Salmond

19.5 in. / 7 lbs. 7 oz.

I know you will ask, Carter is 2 minutes older than his bigger brother.

The first one in the video is Carter and the second is Cooper.

I am sorry there is not more info, we are very tired still. Mary will post when she is fealing better and has time, as driving 30 min. each way to the hospitol to visit the boys is time consuming.

On your mark...

2010-03-09T17:46:00.001-06:00

Dr. just called and said my 24 hr urine collection is positive for preeclampsia, so we are headed to the hospital for an overnight observation, and the boys should be here by tomorrow. Think good thoughts!!

Laying low

2010-03-08T18:07:00.004-06:00

I went in for my appointment today, and when they took my vitals and my systolic BP was over 140 and I had gained 30lbs in the past 2 & 1/2 weeks (I swear my eating habits haven't changed!!!). So, I went in to see the Dr. and he took one look at my massive cankles and sent me to the lab on my way up to L&D for an evaluation.

My labs weren't terribly out of the ordinary, but I have pitting edema (the kind of swelling that stays indented) up to my knees, my hands and stomach are also retaining fluid, and one of the spot checks in my UA was slightly positive, so I was sent home to collect a 24 hr urine sample and to be on STRICT bed rest. My BP did lower slightly into the 120s-130s while up in L&D, so I'm allowed out of bed to collect my urine and shower while at home.

The good thing is that I will be going in Sunday afternoon for them to check me out and see if I'm ready to be induced. With all the extra fluid I'm retaining, my Dr. doesn't want to wait too much longer. So, hopefully the boys will make their debut sometime Sunday or Monday. Until then I'll be chillin in my room with Koa at my side.

The belly that launched 1,000 stares

2010-03-02T11:59:00.003-06:00

The past 10 days have been pretty rough. My legs and feet have become VERY swollen, making it difficult to not only walk, but I can't spend much time at the computer either. Also, by the end of last week I declared that I am no longer driving. It's very uncomfortable and I think I've done a pretty good job driving myself the 30 miles to the military hospital at least twice a week up to the 36 week mark!

So, my buddy Vanessa agreed to take me to my NST on Monday. When I walked out to her van she said, "you still look great!" and then I turned to the side, and her mouth dropped and I think "holy cow" followed. While at the hospital I had at least 3 random people stop to talk to me about how huge I was, which is always something you like to hear! At the end of my NST I had a pretty big contraction that I didn't recognize as one b/c I thought that feeling was just the boys pushing up against my ribs (I thought that feeling of not being able to breath was normal). This got Vanessa VERY excited and she decided that I needed to go into labor that day b/c she didn't have soccer/dance/or any other obligations with her kids...and she was with me (it was so cute how excited she was).

We had to go back down stairs to wait for some medications in the Pharmacy, and I continued to have a few painful contractions down there in the waiting room. After an hour, Vanessa went to see what was taking so long, and they said it should be out very soon. About 20 minutes later the pharm tech was trying to get Vanessa's attention, and I was currently having another contraction, and when she went up to get it he said, "just sign for her, and get her out of here!" I guess my facial expressions said it all.

So, we went to BooksaMillion and then the mall to see if walking around would increase the contractions...instead it was more stares and people asking me when I was due. At one point we split up and I headed to the bathroom and V went into Journey's to pick up some shoes for her son, and a couple came in Journey's talking about the HUGE pregnant woman they just saw!

NOW I REALLY DON'T WANT TO LEAVE MY HOUSE! I know I'm big...but what woman likes it called to her attention every 5 minutes!

I'm not going to post a picture b/c now I'm crazy self-conscious, but two weeks ago (@34weeks) I was measuring the size of a woman carrying 1 baby that was 3 weeks overdue...hope that visual is good enough :o)

**I did forget to mention that Hoss finally flipped back to being head down (he has changed positions 3 times in the past 4 weeks), and he is currently the presenting twin**
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On a much brighter note, one of my bloggy friends, Kristina, is accepting donations for her "Snuggies for Seniors" drive that will last the entire month of March. Please check it out, as you will be amazed by her compassion and unparalleled wit!

My pondering about what really matters in life, brought to you by Ambien

2010-02-23T22:31:00.004-06:00

As I sit and ponder about the most important things the world is facing, many things come to mind:

will I ever have cute ankles again?

will the new horizontal stretch marks appearing on my belly give me a large canvas to play tic tac toe while I have some down time during labor?

once I'm done having kids, will the plastic surgeon be able to reconstruct my humpty dumpty body all together again?

if I got a nose ring, wouldn't that just be the coolest thing ever? come on, everybody's doing it, which means it's a total must!

and the most important question of all...

who was in charge of helping the top 12 girls from American Idol pick out their wardrobe?

and...what was Kara smoking?

Eric and I have our favorite weekly shows, but American Idol has been hit or miss the past couple of seasons. Neither one of us could stand Adam Lambert, so we stopped watching that season the further along he got.

This season we saw a lot of promise in the initial cities, but there were also a lot of people getting golden tickets that needed to keep their day jobs. And by having Katy Perry as a guest judge, has made me stop listening to her music all together...she is a hateful heifer in my book!
Anyways, back to the wardrobe choices...it's like it was a game to see who could look the most ridiculous! The first girl had to be sewn into her outfit which was a black lace shorty jumper with a horrendous belt. Then there was another girl that looked like she put on granny's nighty, but wore it over one shoulder to show her massive style, and polished it of with...I bet you can't guess...a hideous belt! Another girl wore 'jeans' that looked like they were about 5% cotton, and 95% Lycra. DiDi, who I actually really like, was wearing was looked like grandmas rug from under the coffee table...but it worked with the vibe of the song.
Simon says this is the season for the girls, but I was utterly unimpressed. I normally don't babble on about things like this but if Ellen somehow has the credentials to judge a singing competition b/c she "appreciates music," then I feel I have every right to make my opinions known (to the 5-10 people that read my blog) because I have a deep appreciation for music and class.

At least when Paula was there, you were glued to the screen to find out what crazy move or swarm of words she would expel...or, there was always the hope for a true flat faced knock out onto the judging table. Kara is getting more hateful every season, and I have NO clue what she was talking about in relations to the "pitch" problems for two of the singers...maybe it's where they are sitting during the performance, or how it's relayed into the TV...we just aren't connecting this season.

I think might be time to just stick with Survivor this season, it's Heroes vs Villains, and so far it has been VERY entertaining.

Now, I'm feeling very tired and having problems concentrating on the words on the screen, so it's time for me to go pass out.

Mary, OUT!

It's been a long week

2010-02-20T00:05:00.002-06:00

I've been having contractions off and on for about the past two weeks, but lately they are the worst between 2-3am til about 8am. This has translated into me not really sleeping at all. I can't seem to get comfortable, and getting in and out of bed every 45 minutes to pee is starting to grate on my nerves.

But, I had an appointment with the Perinatalogist at Sacred Heart, and Little Man is now weighing in at 5lbs 2oz, and Hoss is 5lbs 6oz. That's a lot of babies!!! They were both practice breathing during the ultrasound, and were hopping off the NST monitor with every contraction...and I was having them up to 6 minutes apart. But, not consistent enough. So I was sent on my merry way and told to go back to the hospital when the "pain was so bad you can't take it." Because I'm over 34 weeks, they won't try to stop labor.

So, I headed home for another sleepless night, and day, then another night, and day.

Bright and early Friday morning, with about 2 hrs total of sleep, I headed to Eglin AFB Hospital for my OB appt. The doc gave me some Ambien to try, at the lowest dose, because he was worried about how fatigued I was getting. I also talked with him about doing the Group B Strep test early since I could really go at anytime, so which he said, "you read my mind!" He also promised me that if I make it to 36 weeks, he will schedule an induction for 38 weeks. With how big the boys are now, it will really be my only chance to have a regular delivery.

Then I headed off for my NST, and the nurse couldn't find the heart beats, so another OB came in and did an ultrasound and found that the boys are laying transverse now (sideways)...even though they were head down on Tuesday. I barely have enough room to breath, yet they are flipping around on me! Silly boys!

I'm trying to hang in for another couple of weeks. Sorry if I've been absent from my normal tasty stalks, but the longer I sit at the computer, the bigger my feet and legs swell.

So, keep your fingers crossed that the boys will do one final flip back to being head down, and I can start sleeping and return back to my utterly charming & witty self ;o)

Happy early Valentine's Day!

2010-02-13T16:22:00.004-06:00

Eric and I seem to have an Army mandated tradition, we are never together on Valentine's Day. Out of the 9 we've shared, only 2 have been in person. He was either deployed, TDY at a school, or for the past couple years he's been in the swamps with the Ranger students.

This year we were excited that he had the day off...until 4 days ago, and now he will be at work all day. So, we cashed in a $25 gift certificate to a local steak house and had an early dinner on Friday to celebrate. And...he loves his gift, can't you tell?Also, it snowed here in Florida! Can you believe it? It started as sleet in the early afternoon, then we had huge flakes for about an hour...then it stopped and all melted away before 6pm. It was funny driving around because people were standing on their porches in flip flops (or bare foot) and tank tops holding a video camera...the last time it snowed here was over 20 years ago. I did find out Koa is NOT a fan of snow, as shown in the picture below. He ran outside, then ran even faster back through the doggy door. But, if you look closely, you can see the snowflake on his back :o)
Happy Valentine's Day everyone, and I'll probably do another post after my appointment with the Perinatalogist on Tuesday...because bedrest is really boring and I don't have much else to talk about.

Mary the 1st I am, I am

Counting down the days

So Grateful

Give 'em the pickle!!

Spending time with my boys

I've been writing this post in my mind for the past 2 weeks

Too cute!

Pay It Forward

So...I think my neighbors are making Meth

Pulling my head out of the sand

Tip of the Hat & Wag of the Finger

Some people have too much time on their hands

It gets easier...right??

Giveaway winner & SO much more

Come join the fun!

"Bitter Is The New Black" GIVEAWAY!!!

A guest post by Taylor Darden

Don't unfollow me yet!!

Do you live next door to Bree?

REALLY??

One last plug! **UPDATED**

WARNING: Mad Skilz Ahead

I think everyone needs a good laugh!

It's all happening so fast!

Oh Eric...really??

I *Heart* My Army Wife Life!

Why I love my job

Let the Battle Begin!

My reason to walk

We've got orders!!!

My favorite signs

How time flies!!

Running a little behind

Who's right anyway?

Jen, would you be my BFF?

Dear Velveeta

So many things to be thankful for!

The BIG 250!

What happened to the service part of customer service?

Self fulfilling prophecy

Warning: This post is NOT for the faint of heart

Going MIA

Adventures in Commissary shopping

The funk...I hear it's going around

Review, but no giveaway

6 Months!

First, and foremost...

A crap ton of fun

A little of this and that...

Adventures in military lodging

Carter vs. Carrots

Were they really the good ole days???

The "DIE" in diet

Oh boy, Oh boy

The great debate

Getting dirty with the girls

My very first GIVEAWAY!!!

A License to Kill

Never say Never

The giggles and more

I will NOT be mocked!

How I'm scarring my children for life

I'm Amazed by You

Visiting friends

"Bitter Is the New Black" by Jen Lancaster

It's a pity party, and you're all invited!

Who's the artist anyway?

My week "off"

What a week!

Quick update

My 'Dead to Me' list is growing...

The thrill is gone

Happy Memorial Day

Getting better everyday...

Happy Mother's Day, Birthday, & Anniversary!

Note to self...

Letting it all hang out

BIG NEWS!!!

Knock on wood!

Getting back in the saddle sure is a pain in the butt!

One last plug! UPDATED

I Heart My Army Wife Life!