It's the END OF THE WORLD...or I've lost my taste in fashion

For several months I've been on the look out for some new tops.  I always seem to pick the same colors and very plain t-shirts and I am trying hard to NOT look frumpy.

Earlier this week when I had some time to kill I went to a few stores and couldn't bring myself to try on a single item.  The only tops I liked were solids and mostly either black or white.  I don't know about most of you but I don't look good in hot pink/orange/yellow/lime, turquoise/orange combo or these grandma floral prints that I swear came from curtains in a nursing home.  I thought we were over the 80/90's look of stone washed jeans, lace/sheer combo, and putting spikes/studs on clothing.  Also, I know there are other curvy ladies out there who don't appreciate the horizontal stripes.

The final insult was today, at Forever 21, where the hubby found this:

A Storm Trooper holding a boom box. (There was also one with Chewbacca in Aviators...I vetoed both)

As you can see by the look on my face, I just threw up in my mouth a little.  I will admit to being a Star Wars fan, but WHO does this cut look flattering on?  Everything is in a flowing cut, which does NOTHING for those of us who are, ummmm, blessed up top.  Clothing worn during the day shouldn't look like sleep shirt, which is what the hubby suggested I use this top for.

I personally blame this on two people, Taylor Swift and Hipsters.  They are destroying America, I'm sure of it.

I'm prepping for the Apocalypse, are you?