Will my heart go on?

I haven't been sleeping well lately...catching 2-3 hours when I can...but last night I slept full 4.5 hours before being woken up by my phone. So, I need a dream interpretation:

I can't quite remember the first part of the dream...but I was with a small group of people, and we were trying to steal a boat and run away from some bad guys at the same time (I didn't recognize anyone I was with). So, we are about to take off with the boat, then the lake we are next to suddenly starts to pull away from the shoreline and a tidal wave starts to form and head right for us. Everyone starts to scramble, and when it hits it knocks our boat over but I somehow manage to never let my head go below the water. There is a few of us holding onto the tip of the boat (the only thing visible above the water), then it cuts to a different scene.

Leonardo DiCaprio and I are sitting on a small boat together talking about our adventures and comparing my disaster to his on the Titanic...which I guess he survived in my altered reality. Then he totally starts coming on to me!!! Then I woke up to my phone ringing.

Umm...yeah, I am kind of worried. I finally get a solid 4 hours of sleep, and this is what I get! But, I haven't really been dreaming at all lately, so maybe this was a lot of built up craziness that had to be released at once. Sometimes I worry myself!

Threatdown: Cold Weather!!!

There is only thing destroying America this week...and for the next 5-6 months...cold weather. I really really really hate cold weather. Yea, the clothes are cute, but I can never seem to keep warm.

I LOVED my 3 years in Hawaii. The coldest temperature I ever had to experience was 64 degrees...what a glorious time it was. The summer temperatures never got above 98, and we always had the trade winds. Can I please move back?!?!?!?

My husband convinced me that we were moving to FL, where is was warm, when in reality we are really in southern Alabama! I live a whopping 28 miles south of the border.

This rant is brought to you by the first freeze of the season last night. It never got above 60 yesterday, so I busted out my space heater (b/c I refuse to turn my heater on before November, b/c I am cheap) and cuddled up with my Koa and prepared for the worst.



He didn't want to get out of bed this morning....and I can't blame him. By the time I woke up, the temperature in my house was down to 65 degrees. Ok, I know this probably doesn't seem bad at all for most of you...but I would keep my thermostat at 80 degrees all year round if I had my way...but I have to make a compromise for my Sexy Beast.

Eric called me right before he was getting ready to come home from work this morning @ 0500, and said that the temperature out at the Ranger camp had dropped to 29 degrees last night...but at least he got to sit in the Humvee last night instead of a sleeping bag on the ground, he really lucked out!

So...
Winter, winter, go away
Don't come back another day!
I refuse to go outside to play
I just want a warm, sunny day!

3 down...1 to go

Geez...I told you guys to stop pressuring me to finish all the book so fast, I can never back down from peer pressure!

So I just finished "Eclipse" and I liked "New Moon" better. I found myself smiling more in the 2nd book...and I really don't like how Jacob behaved in this one!

Who knows when I will have a chance to get to the last one, but I am intrigued about this newly engaged Bella & Edward. One of the chicks at school was saying that @ her daughter's school everyone is wearing T-shirts that say "Team Edward." I just really like Edward's character, and I am starting to think Bella is a little crazy, and just a bit too immature.

Oh well...Only one more to go. But, I now understand why the books were so popular...I have had a hard time putting them down. I only started this one Sunday...and just finished it. But, I think a lot of that has to do with my addictive personality. I am glad that I waited to read the series till they were all available...b/c I would have gone crazy waiting for the next book. Maybe I will finally start reading the Harry Potter series....but then again...probably not!

My super-bendy curse

I never thought I was out of the ordinary til I saw my orthopedic surgeon last April. I have very loose ligaments that gives me quite a bit of flexibility (get your mind out of the gutter!!!). This has caused my right shoulder to continually fall out of the socket, and in doing so, causes extreme pain & inflammation that then impinges my rotator cuff. I started PT in April & started getting steriod injections, today being my 3rd in 7 months...and the doc said no more for 12 months.

Normally, a trauma causing this condition could be fixed with surgery, with great prognosis...but b/c mine is due to my loose ligaments, there is a 60% success rate...and today he said he didn't want to operate until I did 12 months of PT...and I have done 7 already without much improvement.

I have regained most of my range of motion and strength...but the pain gets unbearable, and results in numerous sleepless nights b/c of the it...and many days filled with pain.

I can't take normal NSAIDS (to reduce the inflammation) b/c they all really irritate my stomach...due to taking them for way too many years...the military thinks Motrin is the wonder-drug cure all! So, I am kind of at a loss. I was taking the mass dose of Tylenol allowed w/ some relief...but I really don't want to destroy my liver before I am 30.

People have joked that they can smell me coming b/c I am always wearing or putting on Bengay, but I really don't know what else to do. Heat helps much more than cold...but I am just really frustrated.

The doc also told me that this is something I will grow out of..."I never see 30 or 40 y/o with this problem." So, I told him my concern with wanting children, but not wanting to tear my rotator cuff in the process of caring for them...and he said that the problem will probably increase with pregnancy b/c the hormones cause all your ligaments to become more lax...WTF!!!

So...he didn't want to give me another injection b/c it can increase the risk of tearing my rotator cuff...but I told him I just need to get through the next week of clinical...then no more heavy lifting and I promised to be back in 6 weeks for another check up.

Sorry, just needed a "woe is me" moment.

Another Saturday night with Bella

I received "New Moon" Saturday morning...and b/c I read the teaser at the end of "Twilight," I was dying to figure out what happened.

So, not bad...and not what I expected. It is very interesting how pretty much the entire book was about werewolves...and Bella didn't get too whiny until the end. I liked the foreshadowing with the mention of Romeo & Juliet, and how it was a constant theme.

I loved Jacob!!! He is my favorite character. His determination made me smile, and reminded me of a similar situation I had High School.

All in all, a good read. I also love her name, and all the nicknames she has...but I might be partial b/c my niece's name is Annabelle, and we all call her Belle.

What did you think?

I have finally made my decision

I have been doing a lot of research lately about who I am going to vote for...and after reading this, it has solidified my answer.

Check it out:
http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/huntleybrown.asp

I was leaning this way anyway...but now I am decided!

I trust snopes...and everytime I get a fwd I go to their website to check it out...you would be amazed at how much false information is sent through emails.

Have you made up your mind yet?

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Kinda sad...

Yesterday I went costume shopping with my friend Vanessa b/c she hadn't found a Halloween costume for her daughter yet.

We went to Target to see what they had and I noticed that they had some of their Christmas items up already and I spotted some Winnie the Pooh stuff so I had to go look. I went to go look at the stockings b/c I have a Eeyore one, Eric has Tigger, Tyler had Pooh, and I am always on the lookout for a Piglet b/c we got a different stocking for Tyler so Koa could temporarily use Pooh til we found a Piglet...but then I realized that I don't need another stocking, and I seriously almost started to cry.

I had completely disregarded that fact that Tyler passed away this summer....but I just can't seem to give Koa his Pooh stocking, it just doesn't seem right. So, everyone keep an eye out for a Piglet Christmas stocking for me...b/c Koa is really more of a Piglet than he is a Pooh ;-)

Do they really know?

I think that all babies are out to get me. They are using their baby telepathy to form an alliance against me, and other women who have been married for awhile & don't have kids.

I can not only feel their glares, but they aren't even trying to hide it anymore. Every time I walk past a baby they just stare at me, shooting daggers, wishing they could say, "we know who you are, and what you AREN'T doing!"

Babies, get off my back & stop judging me. Just because I don't have an innate need to hold you, doesn't mean I hate you...I just don't see a need to hold a baby, just b/c it is a baby.

Beware other married women without kids, they are starting to notice & band together. Soon they will take over, and we will be at their mercy!

Why do we always want the bad boy?

Okay ladies, I know it is hard to pay attention with His Hotness so close to the words...but try!

I have just finished reading Twilight, even with the warning of Kristina, but I kind of liked it. Am I going to wait in line over night to get tickets to see the movie?? NO...but I thought it was a fun read. But, it got me thinking (hence the title), why do girls always want the bad boys? Take the fine specimen of a man to my left. He almost always plays the bad guy in movies, but wow, hotness! Don't worry, I am not obsessed, just admiring some of the Lord's finest work ;-)

In Twilight, I kind of wanted to smack Bella around a little for being so whiny, and Edward for putting up with it. And, he tells her over and over, that he is no good for her, she can get hurt...but she can't stay away.

I put a pic of my boy Vin on here instead of the kid that is playing the movie version of Twilight b/c I don't think the actor is cute at all...and I needed to prove my point. (yeah, that is a good excuse!)

Am I the only one that has ever pursued a guy I knew was bad for me, and completely ignored everything people were telling me, and what I was seeing for myself (this is in NO WAY related to my Sexy beast!)??

Do we really think we can change them? Do we want to change ourselves just to be with them?

I also didn't think that the book should be geared towards teenage readers...yeah, a little too much sexual tension, in my opinion, for that target age group.

I am going to continue to read the rest of the series...sorry Kristina...b/c I thought it was entertaining, and it is nice to have something to read that isn't related to Nursing, and the only other thing in my house is military war history books...or Halo (um, that would be a no).

Who else had read the series, and what did you think?

"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted" -Randy Pausch

I have never ever bought a self-help book, or anything of that nature...but after view the following video on YouTube, I knew I had to buy the book, "The Last Lecture."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo

(the entire video is 1 hr 16min, and worth every second!)

I used my school related reading as an excuse not to read anything else, and I was missing out. I have become so consumed, and distraught with school lately, that I needed a release. I needed to read something that would uplift me and inspire me, and that is exactly what I found.

This book has some of the similar stories portrayed in his last lecture video, but it has so much more. It is less than 200 pages, but it gives you so much hope and inspiration. The author passed away this summer from Pancreatic cancer that had metastasized to his liver, but it isn't a book about cancer, it is a book about living.

I love his enthusiasm and pure love of life, and the care for those who surrounded him.

It also gave me some perspective and great advise about how I want to live me life.

With my new medications, my sleeping schedule has been severely wonky...and I finished the book early this morning...and it was just how I needed to start my weekend!

My Threatdown

The weekly update of what is destroying America.

5. Bugs

Sure, scientists say they are a vital part of the maintaining homeostasis, but I sure like to kill them (well, I scream until my husband kills them). I say we send all the bugs in the US to Australia, like we did in the old days with our prisoners. Half of the bugs on that continent are deadly anyway....no free rides, let the strongest survive!


4. People that make more money than me.

I understand that some of you have worked really hard for what you have, but I still don't like you, and you should share the wealth...but if I had money like you I would hoard it and make everyone around me suck up to me so I could buy their love.

3. Judgemental people

People that walk around making judgments about everyone they see drive me crazy, therefore making me walk around and judge you. This is a vicious cycle that must be stopped. So, stupid people, stop making me be stupid too....it has to stop somewhere, so you need to make that first step!

2. Pushers

There are a certain kind of people out there that know how to inspire, and those that push...STOP PUSHING!! I am not 12 years old, I don't need my hand held, and I am old enough to take responsibilities for my own actions...so back off! (whew......vent over)

***and just for Brittany***

1. BEARS

Especially Polar bears...stop complaining about your habit disappearing, suck it up and get a job. People have to adapt to their surroundings all the time, especially when flesh eating beasts start wandering into our neighborhoods looking for picnic baskets...full of people! Their cute appearance is just a muse to try to wear us down...fight the power!

**Just as a reminder...this is all done in fun, and is nonsense on purpose**

Darn you, Allergies!!!

I have lived all over the US, and never had any issues...and believe me, I was thankful. But, about 18 months ago I started developing some allergies...and have spent the past 18 months trying to find something that works.

After the first 6 months I thought I hit the jackpot when I found Allegra-D...but a year later it began to lose it's effectiveness.

I was finally referred to an allergist, and endured 2 & 1/2 hours at the clinic yesterday being scratched 60 times...which didn't give him the result he wanted...so I was then injected down my right shoulder 20 times.

And, drum roll please....................................................I am allergic to quite a few things...but not horribly. I am more allergic to cats than dogs. I told him that getting rid of my Koa was non-negotiable. His assistant said, "well, that means you would have to get shots," to which I replied, "that's fine, if I can handle the steroid injections in my shoulder...I can handle weekly shots!"

(no worries, I NEVER open mouth kiss my dog...I am not that weird)

The doc thinks it is more a HORRIBLE sinus infection that has never been treated. So, keep your fingers crossed, and lets hope the next 2 weeks of steroids & antibiotics do the trick. Getting off my meds for the testing was horrible, my eyes were so swollen I couldn't even open them all the way...and these new ones are screwing with my sleeping. Oh, to be 25 again ;-)

The fateful Tale of Sammy the (grey rat or pine) Snake

One October morning Sammy was making his way across the long dirt road when I big black truck stopped close by. A very handsome man got out and walked up to Sammy. He looked at him for a while, then quickly grabbed him by the neck and the tail and tossed him into the back of his truck.

It was quite a bumpy ride, so Sammy searched for a more secure place to lay, there was an opening that he quickly went into and endured the rest of the ride.

The truck stopped and he heard the very handsome man sound frustrated, so he quickly weaved himself tightly through every available hole and held on for dear life as the man tried to pull him out. After awhile he gave up and headed back down the bumpy dirt road...then down a very fast road, then to stop.

Sammy thought he was finally safe, but then the very handsome man started spraying Sammy with water, and sounding very frustrated. The very handsome man soon gave up and left Sammy alone.

After several hours Sammy got the courage to venture out from the truck to a new world, there was different grass, noises, and SPLAT...Sammy got run over by a car.

***************************************************************************

My husband has a tendency to catch snakes (to include poisonous ones) and turn them into the Snake House at the Ranger Camp. They have a catch & release program so they have one's on hand to do demonstrations for the students, and for the community.

So, he caught this snake on his way home, tried to turn into the Snake House and then the snake was up underneath the truck and he couldn't get out. So, he ended up coming back to the house and then, after awhile he left and then I saw him up the street.

My Tuesday Night pick me up

As most of you know, about 2 years ago I was able to complete my weight loss goal of 95lbs. I didn't have any trouble losing the first 40lbs with exercise, but I hit a road block and stayed @ 190 for quite awhile.

I had made a promise to my late-grandmother that I would attend her 90th birthday party...and I knew she wouldn't like the weight I was at, so I got motivated and joined The Biggest Loser Club online. I had watched the shows and signed up. After 2 months I was able to attend the birthday party 15lbs lighter...and Eric decided to join the club too! Over the next 8 months I was able to lose 40lbs and hit my target weight of 135.

Since losing the weight I always look forward to Tuesday night, as continued motivation, and to reflect on what I have accomplished.

I have really been struggling lately with school, and I love being able to watch a show that not only motivates me, but celebrates the success of everyday people making great choices and taking on the challenge of better health...and in most cases, a new life.

So, thank you Biggest Loser!! Rarely does it ever feel great to be a loser ;-)

Mmm, mmm, good

So, I don't have a lot of self-control when it comes to food...I know this, and try to take measures so I won't have to make the decision whether or not to eat bad things. Well, they were selling 6 packs of full sized candy bars @ the commissary last time we went, and I found myself eating 3 in one day. I asked Eric to take them to work...and he said he would hide them somewhere I wouldn't find them. Well, I didn't go looking for them, but of course I don't cook when he is gone...so I went in the freezer to look through my stash of TV dinners, and found the stash of candy bars by accident.

Some good did come out of this...frozen snickers. I have LOVED snicker forever, but frozen, it is a good thing I only discovered this now. You have to try it!

The Threatdown: this week's list of what is destroying America

I can't claim the fame for the Threatdown. I am a HUGE fan of Stephen Colbert and his satirical humor, so here is my version of the Threatdown.

5. People that have medical problems that I, as a student, can't do anything about

-when I am given a Pt with a serious medical disorder I expect to provide a certain level of care so I can write it down 13 times on the 13 different forms I have to turn in to my instructor. So, when they aren't getting the normal treatments all I can really do is ask them how they feel and make sure they are comfortable. So, sick people, please start to fall within that normal sickly realm so MY life can be a little easier.

4. The Stock Market

-it's very sad when your very small retirement account dimishes over $8000 in little under a year. I finally took everyone advice and used banks and the market instead of burying my $ where it is safe...and stays safe b/c I always forget to make a map or misplace the map for my map. Some of us want to eventually stop working, so start working so I don't have to.

3. Politicians

-there is always a new scandal or story breaking everyday about how McCain/Palin did this or how Obama/& the other guy did that...their plans...and how it will cause the end of civilization as we know it. Instead of a 3 million dollar prize for new energy efficiency in cars, how about a 3 million dollar prize for a device that gives you an automatic "good guy" "bad guy" reading. I would buy one...but then the machines would start to plot against the human race and we would be extinct before global warming could finish what we started.

2. Women that don't wear bras

-seriously...you like the looks of disgust when you walk by, b/c I don't like giving them. It is distracting not only for men...but I don't I can't help but wish someone would tell her "your boobs are sagging, let me show you to lingerie." We're at war, pick a side!

And the #1 threat destroying America is:

1. The internet

-what happened to good old fashioned pencil & paper? All my testing & assignments are done online now...and even when I had a real exam, it was graded by a computer. It's only a matter of time before we become the servants and the struggle for machine domination is over...just like Planet of the Apes.

Well, there you have it. And let me clarify, this is all in good fun and is nonsense on purpose. If you haven't seen an episode of The Colbert Report, you are missing out. It airs on Comedy Central M-Th @1130 (with re-runs the following day @ earlier times).

Sleep is a fallacy and is used as government propaganda to control your mind!

I have to credit the title to a good friend named Scott. He had many interesting philosophies...and one popped into my mind this morning.

Do dogs (and animals in general) have mental/personality disorders? There all those books/people out there defining the overall temperment of certain breeds...when in reality they could be passing on mental illness or personality disorders through their selective breeding.

Jack Russels are super hyper: OCD

Pit Bulls are aggressive: Antisocial Personality Disorder (PD)

Shar-peis are the #1 dog to turn on their owner: Schizophrenia (hallucinations/delusions)

Chihuahuas are bark @ everything: Panarnoid PD

Golden Retreviers are man's best friend: normal :-)

Muts are sometimes the best dogs: all the dominant/recessive gene disorders never got far

Dogs that are classified as lazy: narcolepsy

Cats sometimes love you, then hate you: manic depression

Think about it.

Oh, if I must...

Brittany gave ME a WeBlog award!! I think it is b/c she felt quite obligated since I have been blog stalking her for over a year now, before she was on Blogger. *pause for gasps* She & Michelle showed me the dark since, and I like it!

Here are the rules: I have to answer the following questions with one word answers and one word only! Then I must pass it on to seven others!

This award comes with a list of questions:

1. Where is your cell phone? Desk
2. Where is your significant other? Work
3. Your hair color? Brown
4. Your mother? Ann
5. Your father? Greg
6. Your favorite thing? Eric
7. Your dream last night? Hospital
8. Your dream/goal? Nursing
9. The room you're in? Office
10. Your hobby? Blogging
11. Your fear? Spiders
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Mom
13. Where were you last night? Home
14. What you're not? Shy
15. One of your wish-list items? Mini
16. Where you grew up? EVERYWHERE!
17. The last thing you did? Dinner
18. What are you wearing? Pajamas
19. Your TV? Silver
20. Your pet(s)? Koa
21. Your computer? Alienware
22. Your mood? Tired
23. Missing someone? Yes
24. Your car? Cluttered
25. Something you're not wearing? Watch
26. Favorite store? Gap
27. Your summer? Short
28. Love someone? Yes!
29. Your favorite color? Blue
30. When is the last time you laughed? Today
31. Last time you cried? Today

I pass the torch to:

Sarah- my other witty sister-in-law

Becky- b/c I love how her mind works

Amy- my real sister

Al- who took me in as a new Army wife and led the way

Mike- my loving brother, and so very often, partner in crime

Kelly- great Ranger wife & friend

Gillie- b/c she is a fellow nurse, and helps me realize that I school will eventually end, but the learning never does

Make me proud!

Wahoppin?

I have had some crazy dreams in my day...but wow...I even woke up confused.

My sleeping arrangements have been quite awkward lately, but Eric and I did manage to sleep in the same bed for 2 nights in the past 7 days!! This is an accomplishment!

Well, yesterday morning I woke up really confused (Eric had already left for work). In my dream, my husband & I were hanging out with his Battalion Commander (which we NEVER do) and his teenage daughter (which he doesn't have) was showing me & his wife (that doesn't exist) how to dance and shake our booties like "the strippers do." If this wasn't weird enough, we were also drinking wine (never had a drink in my life) and his BC handed me his glass to hold for him, and I gulp it down...then continue to drink everyone else's wine. Then his BC starts throwing a fit about me drinking all his "hero wine" and insists it be replaced & it is from Italy...so Eric promised to order him more online.

As soon as I woke up I texted Eric to tell him about it (b/c I still wasn't convinced I was awake and this would leave me proof) and after he got off work late that night he called me and cracked up at my crazy dream.

Am I losing my mind?

Why can't I take my own advice?

Every week I tell my Sunday School kids to try to "approach each situation with love." And after that statement, I get grumbles, and I confess that it is a HUGE struggle for me...but when you do, the outcomes is normally a happier one. So, why is it so hard to be nice?

There is a girl (and I say girl for a reason) that I come into contact with frequently that has a chip on her shoulder. So, when I have to talk to her, it just makes my blood boil! I said to a friend yesterday, "if she is going to have a constant attitude, why doesn't she just leave?" And they said, "well, she is going through....." to which I replied, "she has been going through...for over a year!" I just don't understand why people are just outwardly hateful and expect everyone to take it. I really just want to yell at her, but then I wouldn't be approaching the situation with love, and what kind of role model would I be? (the real reason is I have to deal with this person too often that it would only make the situation worse)

So, why do I have to be the bigger person...it is no fun, and it really sucks! There are numerous people that I really can't stand, but I have the maturity to treat them with respect and avoid a confrontation (and them).
I am going to vent by stealing Michelle's idea...writing her a letter I will never send.

Dear Rude Girl,

I have gathered from our interactions that there is definately a conflict, but SUCK IT UP AND GROW A PAIR! We are both adults, and I really don't appreciate the attitude you so lovingly display anytime there is a task/discussion that you don't agree with or want to do. No, life isn't always fair, DUH, but part of functioning in the real world is dealing with every kind of person and situation.

I am personally sick of your attitude and don't EVER want to spend time with you b/c of it, but I know spending time with you is inevitable, so grow up, and start playing nice. I am really sick of being the bigger person, and I am not sure how much longer I can. So, to avoid confrontation, grow up and start playing nice. I realize you are dealing with a lot in your life right now, and for awhile, but so are so many people around you and they manage to function in society.

I don't hate you, I just really don't like to be around you...and just wanted to bring up the fact that your bad attitude effects everyone around you, in case you didn't know.

-Me

I feel so much better....

Sticking with this month's theme...

I know there are other women out there who are also "blessed" (or as I always say, cursed) when it comes to genetics. I have the answer!!!

I found out about these sports bras last year when I was working at the gym. I saw a fellow "blessed" female running on the treadmill...and she wasn't bouncing all over the place. I got up the courage to ask her about it when she was finished with her run. Her eyes lit up and she said, "isn't it great?" "See," she then started jumping up and down, "they don't move!!!" I found out where to get them, and forked out the best $60 I have ever spent.

I bought my first one over a year ago, and I wash it about 3-4times a week, and it is still just as supportive as when I first bought it. I finally bought my 2nd one today....kinda gotta save up for them...and I am so excited!

They aren't sized like normal bras, and pay very close consideration to the rib cage measurement...if it is too tight, you can't breathe. These bras don't give like regular ones, and you won't have to wear 2 to get the support you need. The best part is that I don't have headaches after my workout from straps digging into my shoulders.

Check it out, or find a local sports shop that carries them...not the big chain stores...and try one on. Or, go to http://www.enell.com/ to see for yourself.

Happy breast cancer awareness month :-)

Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!

Since I am pretty sure only women read my blog, I just wanted to send out a little reminder. October is breast cancer awareness month and I just wanted to encourage all women >40 or who have had a 1st line relative diagnosed with breast cancer to get your yearly mammogram!!!

And for the younger, married folks...make it a game, get your spouse involved and do your monthly self breast exams. I know Eric likes to use this excuse ;-)